This "Legend of the Deep" is Mighty Shallow

Today’s post begins with a fractal called Waves and Whirlpools. I thought it would be a suitable choice for a review of The Water Horse: Legend of the Deep.
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One of Robyn and my Christmas Day traditions is that we always go to see a movie: this year we chose to see The Water Horse: Legend of the Deep. I was so utterly uninspired by the movie that I didn’t end up writing the review until today. (Then again, if the title of this post didn’t tell you how I feel about the movie you’ve been living under a rock way too long!)
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This movie was based on a book by Dick King-Smith (author of the charming children’s book Babe). Not having read the book I can’t tell you how close the filmed version of The Water Horse comes to the source material so I can’t compare the two. The story takes place in World War II Scotland (Loch Ness to be exact) where you Angus isn’t fitting in well. He is drawn to the water yet fears it (for reasons unexplained). Once day he finds something strange and brings it home. This sets up the “boy meets creature/creature causes chaos/boy sets creature free/boy saves creature from bad guys” plot that is familiar from so many other movies of this sort. (In this case the bad guys are British Soldiers stationed in Scotland to hunt for submarines.) There is a sub-plot involving a mysterious new arrival and the Commander of the British forces that isn’t fully developed (and seems mostly there as filler for older viewers who want more content) but you‘ve seen this all before.
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There are no surprises ANYWHERE in the story but all the parts are ably acted (by a bunch of Brits I’ve never heard of before). The rugged New Zealand scenery stands in wonderfully well for Scotland--and the movie is gorgeous to look at. The colors are a bit solemn but the shots are nothing short of picture postcard perfect. The eponymous “Water Horse” is wonderfully realized with a combination of CGI and models: the scenes shot in the Loch are far and away the best reason to see this movie.
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In the end The Water Horse: Legend of the Deep is a pleasant, if unremarkable family film. There is little originality and not much magic in movie but it is good fun for the entire family. The kids will like the "water horse" and their parents won't be bored beyond belief. I can’t recommend it but this movie is not a turkey of colossal proportions either.
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FINAL GRADE: C

Reviewing my Christmas Music collecction

Today’s post begins with a fractal called Poinsettia. To my mind it is possible the “best” holiday fractal I’ve ever done so it seems appropriate for a “Best Of . . .” review. Sadly, it's a little late but that's my fault. ANYway--on with the post!
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I have a sad confession to make. I like Christmas music. I really like Christmas music--so much so I have 69 albums in my collection (and that’s not counting double-disk sets!) The worst of it is this: I play it non-stop from the day after Thanksgiving through New Year’s Eve--one album after another. I was chatting with Robyn and she asked which albums I liked best: honestly I couldn’t tell her so I decided to do this review to help me clarify my choices.
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I will divide the rest of my post into three sections, Best, Worst, and Best/Worst. Ranking will be in alphabetical order: choosing a favorite would be like choosing amongst one’s children. Hard to do (although if you read between the lines it shouldn’t be hard to figure out my absolute best/worse choices.
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BEST
A LITTLE CHRISTMAS MUSIC (the King‘s Singers). One of my oldest (and one of my favorite albums), this male sextet from England gets help from operatic soprano Kiri Te Kanawa, the City of London Sinfonia, the Canadian Brass and other artists on 21 cuts that runs for close to an hour. There’s a nice mix of sacred and secular music here: some works are performed “straight” but the King’s Singers aren’t afraid to have a little fun. Their arrangement of The Coventry Carol is a jarring mess but the rest of the album is top-notch. A must for any fan of choral music.
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AN IRISH CHRISTMAS (Moya Brennan). Moya (nee Maire) Brennan borrows a little of her baby sister Enya’s ethereal quality for her musical offering but uses it to better effect. She uses a lot of “layering” in her music but isn’t afraid to add in a few ethnic elements to freshen up her sound. Her version of Carol of the Bells is haunting and beautiful--as is the rest of the album. FIND this album and BUY it!
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CELTIC CHRISTMAS (Eden‘s Bridge). I found this album in a “bargain bin” for $5.00--and I’ve gotten ten times the price in enjoyment from it. Christmas is With Us Again is an original masterpiece of a song and most of the other stuff is beautifully sung and played. Some of the “praise” aspects go a bit “over-the-top” for my taste but that doesn’t happen often.
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CHRISTMAS (Manheim Steamroller). This is the album that fired my obsession for holiday music. First and still the best of their many Christmas albums. The mix of rennaisance and modern music still sounds as fresh today as it did when I first heard this album more than twenty years ago.
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EVERYTHING YOU WANT FOR CHRISTMAS (Big Bad Voodoo Daddy). Mostly secular and popular songs played with the quintessential “swing band” style and hipster attitude. This is just forty minutes of pure fun that you’d truly have to be a real “Grinch” not to love! There are also a few cuts of music I've nver heard anywhere else.
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FESTUVAL OF THE HEART (John Boswell), Mostly solo piano arrangements of well-known sacred carols, it is an hour’s worth of gentle relaxation. This album is a must for any lover of piano music.
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NOEL (Canadian Brass). Another album that I bought because it was super cheap that turned out to be surprisingly good. This quintet gets help from flautist James Galway, flamenco guitarist Angel Romero and the King’s Singers among others. This album has a wide variety of music so the brass doesn’t overpower the listener.
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ON CHRISTMAS NIGHT (Cherish the Ladies). Four good looking girls mixing traditional Irish dance music with Christmas carols--how could you ask for anything more. I just bought this album and it is already one of my favorites.
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THE BELLS OF DUBLIN (The Chieftains). The venerable band of traditional Irish musicians is joined by such diverse musical talents as Elvis Costello, Jackson Brown, Ricky Lee Jones and even Burgess Meredith (!?!) not to mention the Westminster Cathedral Choir. Fans of popular music AND Celtic music are sure to love this. I’m particularly fond of The St. Stephen’s Day Murders (which appeals to my warped sense of humor) and The Rebel Jesus (which offers an outsider‘s perspective on Christmas).
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THE SWEETEST GIFT (Trisha Yearwood), This gal knows her way around a song! Doesn’t matter whether the song is sacred or secular she still does it justice. Somehow she doesn’t manage to make Sweet Little Jesus Boy (a negro spiritual) sound completely ridiculous and two songs I’ve never heard anywhere else (It Wasn‘t His Child and Walk Through Bethlehem) are nothing short of spectacular.
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WRAPPED IN WHITE (John Doan). This album is just plain odd (which might explain why I love it so). Each of the cuts is two or more songs mixed together into one tune (Jolly Old King Wenseslas is an excellent example.) Doan plays all the instruments himself and they are a weird and diverse lot including (but not limited to) Harmonium, Toy Piano, Harp guitar (yes, that’s one word--and the thing looks even weirder than it sounds!) and antique Edison Phonograph. A delight for any fan of musical esoterica.
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BEST/WORST
A GIFT OF SONG (Mason Williams and Friends). As long as he sticks to traditional carols this album is awesome! I loved the mix of Classical Gas with What Child is This to come up with What Tune is This? The other traditional carols are nicely handled but sadly the album is about half new material that’s frankly dull and none too Christmas-y (even if he does try and dress it up in the liner notes.)
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BOOGIE WOOGIE CHRISTMAS (Bryan Setzer Orchestra). Setzer is a fierce guitarist and his swing band is first rate. Most of the stuff on this album is first rate and songs like Santa Claus is Back in Town and Baby It’s Cold Outside (sung with Ann Margaret in full sexpot mode) are good, clean dirty fun. Still, his version of O Holy Night can make dogs howl. I think this is stuff that would go over particularly well in a live show.
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BRAND NEW YEAR (SheDAISY): slick and over-produced like much of their work, this album has some cool stuff and some stuff sure to make your teeth hurt. I particularly love Twist of the Magi (which is just “pure-D“ evil) and the hidden acapella track How Can I Keep From Singing. Some real stinkers like Santa’s Got a Brand New Bag and That’s What I Want for Christmas could have been left off and it would have been a better album. Still, there’s enough good stuff to keep me listening year after year.
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CHRISTMAS PORTRAIT (the Carpenters). It’s hard to fault a voice like Karen Carpenter’s. She had hands-down one of the best voices ever recorded and there is a sad sweetness and “little girl lost” quality that comes through in many of her songs. Sadly brother Richard fills the album with overwrought musical arrangements and instrumentals that are horrid, gooey glop. This is a classic case of “less is more”. Take out the choral pieces and Richard's piano work and you've got a damn fine Christmas CD.
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Songs from CALL ME CLAUS (Garth Brooks). Given the right material Garthie can really do a song justice and there are a number of gems on this album. Such diverse tunes as Mary Had a Little Lamb and Zat You Santy Clause? are loads of fun. Then you hear It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year and you realize how limited his vocal ability really is. Garth also suffers from the curse of over-production on this album. Strings, brass and gospel choirs overwhelm him more than once--and Garth should know better by now.
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THE CHRISTMAS ATTIC and THE LOST CHRISTMAS EVE (Trans-Siberian Orchestra). Two slices of the same ham loaf, these massive, self-referential epic “concept” albums each tells a story in traditional and original music. Some of the tunes rock a bit hard for my personal taste but the whole things are worthwhile listens.
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WORST
A FAMILY CHRISTMAS (John Tesh). This musical giant (he’s like 6’7”) brings all the charm and magic of a loaf of stale Wonder Bread to this collection of fourteen instrumental numbers. This album should have been titled Elevator Music for Christmas: the Next Generation. It’s wonderful background music for a party but God forbid you should actually listen to the thing. At least the album cover has a Dalmatian . . .
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CHRISTMAS CAROL and IN DULCE JUBILO (James Galway). Two slices of the same Christmas pie--the first in English, the second not. There is some beautiful choral work on both albums and there is no doubt Galway is an excellent flautist. Still, after a while the overly-lush strings and overall sameness and syrupy soporific quality of both albums drives me to distraction. These are best taken in small doses--maybe I should set my CD Player on “shuffle” and include livelier music when I play these.
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CHRISTMAS SONG (Manheim Steamroller). Chip Davis went back to the holiday well one-time-too-many for his latest effort. There is no magic or originality in the tunes he re-works for this album and his new material is nothing short of coma-inducing. I could really also have done without the guest appearance by Johnny Mathis on The Christmas Song. There’s no denying the guy still has a good voice but his overly-precise, hyper enunciated style sets my teeth on edge. (To me a Christmas without having to hear Johnny Mathis is like a fully stocked shopping mall with no crowds when I’m doing my holiday shopping--a fond dream).
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SOUNDS OF THE SEASON (Enya). I am an unabashed Enya worshipper--which is why it saddens me to put this album on my “worst” list. Thank God the thing is short (just a bit over 22 minutes) because every song is taken at the same ponderous pace that sucks the energy out of a room. How she managed to turn We Wish You A Merry Christmas into a dirge I’ll never know! The original songs on the disk are egregiously bad as well. What a shame.
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TO DRIVE THE COLD WINTER AWAY (Loreena McKennet). Usually I love her stuff but this short album is spare to the point of being almost skeletal I wanted more and I didn’t get it here which is sad because I’ve heard her do Christmas songs with a fuller sound on other albums. With all her vocal and musical tricks to draw from Loreena McKennit can be awesome but the artistic choice not to on this album--and it didn’t work.
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WINTERSONG (Paul Winter). This new age clarinetist gives us thirty three minutes of new age crap that I’m surprised I still allow to take up space in my CD Case. I have nothing good to say about this album.

A Christmas Surprise: Defending Mike Huckabee

Today’s post begins with a fractal called Christmas Surprise. It seemed suitable for commentary on holiday politics. This is a rare day when I defend a Republican (at least kindasorta) so enjoy it while you can all my right wing readers--and you know who you are!
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The latest tempest in a teapot involves a Mike Huckabee Christmas-themed advertisement. Check it out using this link if you’d like to see the whole thing: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KMUI2XExdIA .) On the surface it is a (refreshingly) innocuous ad sending Christmas greetings. There’s no bashing of other candidates, no party politics--nothing but a greeting like you’d get from almost anyone. Still, the ad is not without controversy: what appears to be a cross gleams over Huckabee’s right shoulder and that has caused plenty of comment and criticism. These critics insist this image was placed their to appeal to Huckabee’s popular base--evangelical Christians. Representatives for the candidate insist the “cross” was merely a bookcase behind their candidate that got oddly lit during shooting.
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Does anyone actually believe this is an accident? (If you do--please rent a brain as quickly as possible!) Every aspect of these big-budget, high production value ads (political or not) is tightly controlled: there are no accidents when these things hit the airwaves. Having said that--all I can say to the critics is so what? Mike Huckabee is a Southern Baptist Minister who has never been shy about sharing his religious beliefs. I actually approve of him wishing folks “Merry Christmas” rather than “Happy Holidays” or sending out “Seasons Greetings”
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Ron Paul (a Republican candidate) said of the ad “when fascism comes to America it will be wrapped in the flag and carrying a cross.” (This is a quote from someone else but I couldn‘t find out who in the time I had to write this post.) Frankly, I couldn’t agree more: I’m just not sure you can apply it to this situation. Sometimes a Christmas Greeting is just a Christmas Greeting. Yes, I’d have been more comfortable if Huckabee’s people had come out and said “yeah, we put that image in there--you caught us,” but they didn’t. Then again, I didn’t really expect them to either.
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It’s a “whole ‘nother” question whether or not one’s faith should be injected into a political debate. Personally I think that topic is a dangerous and slippery slope you shouldn’t go down but that ship has sailed long ago. The Christian Right has been a potent political force since the Reagan era: for good or ill they are here to stay. Me, I don’t think Jesus is a Republican. (I don’t think he’s a Democrat, Libertarian or any other political party.) Jesus says in Luke Chapter 20, verse 26: "then render to Caesar the things that are Caesar's, and to God the things that are God's.” (New American Standard Bible) To me that pretty much says everything ANY Christian needs to hear--ie. religion and politics and two separate entities and never the twain should meet.
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Ah well--be you Republican, Democratic, apolitical or anything else I wish you a “Merry Christmas” to one and all. Likewise to those it matters to--Happy Hanukah, a sacred and satisfying Solstice, Kickin’ Kwanzaa, Rockin’ Ramadhan and a fab ‘n’ funky Festivus! Whatever your holiday tradition is may it be joyous and your New Year filled with peace, prosperity and many blessings.

I Am Legend? No, Not Really...

What Happened? That’s the title of today’s fractal image. I picked it because when I saw the latest version of I AM LEGEND all I could say was--what happened??? What happened to the plot? What happened to the critics? And most of all--what happened to the taste level of the movie-going public? Yes, the colors are completely wrong for such a dark and depressing movie but the title was just too perfect to waste!
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I AM LEGEND began life in 1954 as a Novella by Richard Matheson. This is the thrid big screen version following THE LAST MAN ON EARTH starring Vincent Price (1964) and THE OMEGA MAN (1971) which starred Charlton Heston. The latest big screen big budget blockbuster has almost nothing in common with the source material other than the title and the name of the main character. All versions feature a world-wide plague that turns all of humanity into near-mindless, night-dwelling killing machines and end with the death of the main character.
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The action has been transferred from Los Angeles to Manhattan in the latest version. Action God Will Smith plays Dr. Robert Neville (who seems to be) the last survivor of a world-wide plague (a mutated form of Rubella)--leaving the sufferers (those who didn’t die outright) as near-mindless blood crazed monsters. Manhattan is Ground Zero (imagine that!) and Neville fights a never-ending battle for survival and sanity as he attempts to find a cure for the disease. He believes the “Darkseekers” (so named because they cannot tolerate any form of strong light) have completely devolved. He eventually encounters another survivor and her son that leads to the final showdown between Neville and the Darkseekers.
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There are two reasons to see I AM LEGEND--first and foremost is the setting. I don’t know where the movie was filmed but it certainly looks like a ruined New York City: the sets and CGI are so perfect you will completely believe you are seeing a devastated Manhattan after several years of neglect. There is also no doubt that Will Smith is a wonderfully talented actor: you get to see a lot of that because he’s alone on screen for two thirds of them film (not counting the dog). His monomania and degenerating mental state is movingly portrayed and completely believable. Take these two things away though and you have just another scary flick with all the standard tricks used to scare the audience in any low-budget killfest.
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Maybe I was just too critical but I could never suspend my disbelief long enough to stop the flood of questions running through my head. Why is it that,on an island inhabited by blood-suckers there still manage to be herds of deer and elk--not to mention lions? (I mean--a combination of lack of food and a high predator population should have wiped them out--right?) Why is it that the Darkseekers took so long to go after Neville? And why does Neville go through every “don’t” in the “Slasher Movie” genre? (Surely he must have seen one in his life!) How did Anna get from the mainland to Manhattan Island? How did she survive for three years on her own? (assuming the world is has hostile as New York City at least) How does a Hispanic woman have a son named Ethan for God’s sake??? How does she know about the survivors’ colony in Vermont while Neville doesn’t? ("God told me" just doesn't work here.)
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I’d also like to know why the writers turned the “Darkseekers” into mindless monsters. (I appreciate the fact that they were no longer standard “vampire” caricatures but the way they are done in the film leaves me cold.) I also would love to know why so many critics seemed to love this movie: Richard Roeper of the Chicago Sun-Times absolutely loved it! Sadly, I am in the minority here: the viewing public made this the best December movie opening EVER and most critics can’t heap enough praise on it.
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Yes, the Set Design is “Oscar”-worthy and there are some nice stunts but the CGI monsters look like high-end video game creations. The plot isn’t the least bit logical or believable--not to mention having more holes than Swiss Cheese--and there is nothing new or revelatory in the movie. I can only hope that I AM LEGEND dies a quick death like a Darkseeker exposed to sunlight.
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FINAL GRADE: D+

"Golden Compass" Charts a Complex but Fascinating Course

Today’s post begins with a fractal called Compass. As you can see it’s a “golden” compass--at least partially--and that is important since I will be reviewing The Golden Compass today.
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I knew I’d be seeing The Golden Compass as soon as I saw the trailers last May: the video was nothing short of stunning and I’m a sucker for bears in aromor of any sort. Having read the book (the entire trilogy in fact) by Phillip Pullman (that's His Dark Materials for any of you who might be interested) I was also curious to see how well it would translate from the page to the screen. I can happily report that it makes the translation quite well--for the most part at least (and I‘ll get into wat doesn't work so well a bit later).
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Tomboy Lyra (nicely played by newcomer Dakota Blue Richards) is raising herself (mostly) at Jordan College in Oxford where she saves her “uncle” Lord Asriel (Daniel Craig in a small role that doesn’t leave much impression) from death at the hands of the Magisterium. He gives her an “alietheometer”--a (possibly) magical device that answers questions for those who know how to read it. After the disappearance of the “Gyptian” boy Tony Costa (Charlie Rowe) and her best friend Roger (Ben Walker) who have been stolen away by the “gobblers” she is drawn into the obit of Mrs. Coulter (Nicole Kidman)--a cold as ice be-atch with many secrets of her own. Escaping Mrs. Coulter Lyra is rescued by a band of Gyptians who have been charged to watch after her by Lord Asriel. Lyra journeys Northward with the Gyptians to rescue the stolen children and meets the armored bear Iorek Byrnison (voiced by a computer-enhanced Sir Ian McKellen) aeronaut Lee Scoresby (Sam Elliot doing his usual “western hero“ schtick) and the witch Serafina Pekkala (Eva Green). See the movie or read the book if you want happens from there.
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The movie presents a familiar yet utterly alien world and offers no explanation other than a couple of sentances at the very start of the movie. The makers just lay it out and expect the viewer to just go along (and this might be a problem for some viewers). If you can get past these questions you will find The Golden Compass to be a beautifully-shot, ripping-good adventure story that carries you along on an exciting journey. The writers had to leave out a lot of stuff from the book but most of it won’t be noticed by anyone who hasn’t read the book. (This movie ocst 180 Million to make so it better look good!) Personally I could have done with an explanation of a few things (like what exactly IS “Dust”--other than something to be feared.) The sets are beautiful and the acting and affects are all first rate. The direction never gets in the way of the plot or action. The plot moves along quickly enough that you don’t really have time to think about the inconsistencies in the story. About the only thing I can really complain about is the truly horrid song (it's an unrelentingly-awful "New Age" mess that should have been left out of the movie) over the closing credits. (Yes, it’s that bad!)
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The movie has been condemned by the Catholic League (for being “anti-Catholic”) and criticized by several evangelical groups as “opening the door to atheism”--mainly because all the characters have “daemons” (pronounced (“demons”) and because Phillip Pullman is an avowed atheist. Having read both the trilogy and seen the movie it is my considered opinion (as a main-line protest who grew up Roman Catholic) that The Golden Compass is neither. Yes, it is decided anti-authoritarianism and decidedly pro free will but I didn’t find anything overtly against any religion in either the book or the movie. Yes, the book refers to “the Church” (which the movie wisely avoids in hope of avoiding controversy)--but even the most ardent Catholic must acknowledge a period of Church history where heresy and scientific thought were purged with fire and torture. As for the fears of Fundamentalists everywhere let me just say this--a faith that can’t survive a work of fiction isn’t much of a faith. Watching this movie isn’t going to draw an unbeliever further away from Christ Please give the audience enough credit for the ability to distinguish between a work of faction and something purported to be reality. This is a work of fiction--not an attack on anyone’s faith. Trying to make it something else says more about your beliefs than those who made the movie and he who wrote the book.
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The Golden Compass isn’t for everyone. Fans of fantasy and Science Fiction films (like the Star Wars and Lord of the Rings films) will find a lot to enjoy here. Fans of action and adventure films will probably enjoy it as well. True, the film is not without its problems but the good far outweighs the bad and the visuals cry to be seen on a large screen (if only because of the richness of the detail crammed in every shot). Robyn and I will be buying this when it comes out on DVD and I hope New Line makes enough money on it produced the rest of the trilogy.
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FINAL GRADE: A-

Story Update: Jeffrey Nielsen

Today's fractal image is a pretty random choice. I chose Arrow Rainbow because of the twisted and pointy nature--and that suits the story.
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Now here is a quick update on a news story I commented on some time ago. Back on March 16 2007 I wrote a post titled "It's Simply a Question of Believeability." where I commented on the trial of fromer lobbyist and Republican power-player Jeffrey Nielsen who had been accused of molesting a 14 year-old boy. Back then I thought there was definitely inappropriate conduct (and that he was probably guilty of something--but I maintained I couldn't convict him on something that may or may not have happened. The trial ended with a hung jury and the prosecutor vowing to continue to investigate.
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They did and dug up new evidence: they even added molestation charges against a second minor (this one from Virginia) Yesterday, December 5, Nielsen accepted a plea deal that will give him three years in State Prison (of which he must spend at least 80% of the sentance behind bars). He will also have to register as a sex offender when he finally gets out.
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Should Nielsen have admitted it back when the whole thing came up? Probably. Would he have gotten a lighter sentance if he'd come forward when there was only one charge and less evidence? Again, probably. In the end, all I know for certain is that I feel sorry for all concerned except Jeffrey Nielsen. He deserves everything he's getting and more.

Elegy for a Dieing Congregation

Today’s post begins with another Stained Glass fractal since I am dealing, at least tangentially, with religion. I picked Stained Glass 12 because of the predominance of red in the image: the red is important because I took part in the Ruby Jubilee (that’s 80 years) of the First United Methodist Church of Costa Mesa that prompted me to write this elegy. (Technically, this isn’t an “elegy” unless you count prose poems but I’m still titling the piece that way.
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Saturday evening December First Robyn and I visited a grand old lady. She is still beautiful in spite of her advancing age and slowly-growing decrepitude. Large and elegantly proportioned, she is well-kept but beginning to show her age--not really surprising for someone of eighty. Still, she presents a brave face to her community and a warm, welcoming air to her visitors. The “lady” I’m referring to is the First United Methodist Church of Costa Mesa: the congregation has been around 120 years and their current building was completed in 1928. I came with the Chancel Choir of Community United Methodist Church (of Huntington Beach) to participate in a Christmas Choir Festival for her “Ruby Jubilee”--in celebration of eighty years of servie. Once she was the only Methodist congregation from miles around but now the congregation is in decline.
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The reasons for the decline are many: First UMC Costa Mesa is a downtown congregation: the neighborhood has changed but the church didn’t evolved with it. Many members have moved on to newer churches which have sprung up in the surrounding areas. This building, grand as it is, lacks many of the amenities modern-day church-goes have come to expect--like easy parking. (The facility has 18 parking spots on-site and once those are full worshipers will have to cross a busy street or use an inconvenient parking structure for a nearby medical facility.) The general decline in attendance of “main-line Protestant” Churches has take its toll as well thanks to the rise of “Mega“ Churches.
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Still, I can’t but help feel a certain sense of melancholy when I think about this place. I was sitting in front of some long-term members talking about their church. One woman had been attending since the late 1960s. Back then their attendance was over 400 on a good day. Back then they had a huge choir. Now 45-55 people attend on an average Sunday and their choir number around five. Most of the membership is on the far side of 50 and there aren’t any young families present (a sure sign of a congregation in decline).
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What can be done about the decline? Frankly, I have no clue. The church is already sharing their facility with a Chinese-speaking congregation (a tack taken by many churches in the same situation) in order to help meet expenses. Maybe First UMC is simply ending the end of it’s allotted lifespan: if that is so then I will be sorry. The church has a long history and a lot of love and spirit went into the place. I’ll be sorry if I see that history come to an end. In any case, this great lady has had a great history and her community is better for her presence and she will be missed when she is finally gone..

Gotta Love Them Wacky Roberts Boys...

I always pick a “Stained Glass” post when I’m ragging on religion. (This one just happens to be Stained Glass 60.) For a change though I won’t be taking on the Catholic Church: instead I’ll be talking about those wacky Roberts’ boys in Tulsa Oklahoma. (But hey, you probably figured that out from the title, eh what?)
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You gotta love them wacky “Roberts’” boys. First Oral (and I do so love that name!) Roberts tells his television audience that God would “call him home” if his viewers didn’t raise a certain amount of cash (I think it was nine million dollars) for some project or other. Oddly enough, he actually GOT the money--most of it from a Dog Track owner in Florida (with a long criminal record). Now his son Richard has decided to resign the Presidency of Oral Roberts University after being accused of financial management of school funds including multiple remodeling projects on the family mansion, allowing his daughters to use the University Jet (ORU has a university jet???), giving nonacademic scholarships to friends of the Roberts’ children and buying his wife a Lexus SUV.
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In his statement he said he had “had a long talk with God and wanted to fight the charges but God had insisted he resign--because America had become such a ‘litigious’ society.” I don’t live in Tulsa but here in SoCal we have a name for people who talk to God. We call them schizophrenics! Frankly, I don’t know what I find more hilarious--the fact that Roberts might actually believe this story or the fact that he expects us to swallow it!
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Maybe I’m not a very good Christian or maybe I simply lack understanding of God’s Plan. Maybe if I had enough faith God would speak to me. Most likely I’m just too big a cynic to swallow a whopper like this. It boggles my mind that God would insist that Roberts NOT fight the accusations (especially false ones as Roberts insists). Sorry Ricky-boy--if you ain’t fighting this battle it’s because you did something wrong! It is truly sad to think that there are people out there who will take this statement at face value and not question it in the least but that’s a post for another time. In the meantime--has God been talking to YOU?

"Enchanted": Real Movie Magic

Today’s post features a fractal called Renaissance Magic 11. The number isn’t important (other than to let you know this image comes from a larger series.) I picked the image because it seemed apropos for a review of the movie Enchanted. (The word “Magic” in the title was a good start and the swirly design and pink-peach-and-gold color palette worked well I thought.) ANYway--on with the review!
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QUESTION: what do you get when a fairy tale princess is exiled from her animated kingdom into real world New York City? ANSWER: the latest Disney Studios release Enchanted--and a pretty darn good movie it is too!
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The basic story but it goes something like this: sweet maiden Giselle lives in a cute little house in a forest where surrounded by her animal friends: she meets and “instantly” falls in love with handsome Prince Edward. Edward’s wicked stepmother Queen Nerissa is determined to keep her crown (since it seems Edward can’t take the throne until he takes a wife) so she exiles Giselle to “real world” Manhattan ("where there ARE no happy endings!") Lost and alone, Giselle finally meets Robert--a sad sack lawyer and single father who ha given up on romance. Edward follows Giselle to Manhattan find his “true love” and is pursued by Nathaniel who repeatedly tries to poison Giselle or at least keep the two lovers apart. In the end the wicked Queen gets her comeuppance and everyone else (even the chipmunk!) gets their “happily ever after.”
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Amy Addams (the best reason to see this movie) plays Giselle sweetly without the slightest trace of irony or smarminess and makes you believe in her magic. James Marseden (fresh from his supporting role in Hairspray) continues his seemingly inexorable slide toward complete and utter “pussy”-dom as Prince Edward--who’s as dumb as he is good looking. Susan Sarandon chews the scenery with great abandon as Edward’s wicked stepmother Queen Nerissa: she’s the perfect embodiment of a Disney villainess. British character actor Timothy Spall plays Nathaniel in full “villainous buffoon” mode. Patrick Dempsey departs from his “Dr. McDreamy” personae to play Robert--and has all the charm of a wet blanket. Rachel Covey is cute-as-a-button as Robert’s daughter Morgan and Idina Menzel (who made such a huge splash as the original “Elphaba“ in Wicked on Broadway) plays Nancy, Robert’s long-suffering girlfriend who has a secret bit of romance in her soul.
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True, you can almost here the clockworks turning as the plot cranks along without a single surprise twist anywhere and a cynical viewer might wonder why none of the characters wonder too much about Giselle’s character. (It’s a fairy tale so the viewer is going to need a healthy dose of “willingness suspension of disbelief” to enjoy the movie.) The animated scenes are lushly and elegantly drawn. The few songs by Alan Mencken (who scored so many of the recent “Disney“ cartoons) and Stephen Schwartz (best known for Wicked) are appropriate and clever if none-too-memorable. The live-action scenes are prettily shot and the direction never gets in the way of the actors or the story. This is a fun movie with broad inter-generational appeal suitable for the whole family. (Only a die-hard “Macho Man” or a very young child would NOT enjoy this movie!) I don’t know whether Enchanted will become an enduring “classic” but it is the best family movie out right now.
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FINAL GRADE: A-
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Now THIS is "Truly Outrageous!"

OK folks, follow my chain of association to figure out why I picked the fractal for today’s post. Today’s fractal is called Jemz. I named the image in honor of a 1980s cartoon called Jemm. (I don’t remember all the details but I know it was about a rock star/model who turned into a super heroine.) Like all cartoon offerings of the 1980s it spawned a line of toys--the tag line of which is “Jemm is truly outrageous.” As outrageous as Jemm may have thought she was--this story is truly outrageous! Truly, truly, truly outrageous!
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Just when you think you’ve seen/heard it all you come across a story that just make you drop your jaw. Buried in yesterday’s evening newscast (11/20) I heard a story that literally stopped me in my tracks! The Pentagon has been offering $3000 bonuses to those who re-enlist for military service then sending demand letters to wounded soldiers unable to complete their service.
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I can fully understand, even support, the Pentagon’s position if the soldier fail to complete their service through some fault of their own but going after men and women wounded in service seems completely beyond the pale. Still, thousands of letters have gone out and the feds are collecting from hapless vets under the threat of tax liens and even jail time.
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Is this some sort of weird policy error or did somebody really think it was a good idea? To me, this policy sounds like a classic case of bureaucracy run amok. Honestly, I dunno: still these instructions came form a government sending men and women off to a foreign country than not having proper resources to aid these brave soldiers when they get wounded. To me there is some sort of huge “disconnect” between the cries of “support our troops” and they way said troops are treated once they come home. What’s wrong with this picture folks? Personally, I find this particularly disturbing is the fact that this story gets about one minute’s coverage on the Evening News (and not all newscasts at that) and it hasn’t even been covered in the local paper.
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If there is a bright spot in this story it is this: a congressman (I wasn’t able to find his name) has introduced a bill to prevent the Pentagon from attempting to collect from wounded soldiers. The story came to light after Cpl Jordan Fox was wounded in Iraq by an I.E.D. He contacted station KDKA after he was billed: the Pentagon “reviewed” his case and decided (mere moments before he went on National TV) that the bill was a “mistake.” Still, one has to wonder how many other “mistakes” were made that weren’t corrected because their story didn’t get the same kind of attention.

Another Whiff of "Scandal"

No fractal for this post but I just ran across a bit about our embattled County Sherriff Mike Carona that was simply too dishy not to pass on to my loyal readers! Turns out way back in 1998, (December 15, to be exact) our County Board of Supervisors approved a request from our newly-elected Sherriff (that’s Mikey) to reduce the qualifications needed for the position of assistant sheriff. Sheriff-elect Carona’s request came because he wanted to “facilitate a smooth transition” in the Sheriff’s Department and to “allow the new Sheriff the necessary autonomy to select his executive management team from the broadest possible pool of applicants pool of qualified applicants.” (I found that in Frank Mikadeit’s Orange County Register column this morning and had to quote it.) The two men who eventually got the postions (George Jaramillo and Don Haidl) had some ethical questions surrounding them even before they took the jobs.
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I’m not sure why the Supervisors went for it but they didn’t put up much of a fight. (They voted 5-0 in favor.) Yesterday (1120) the Board of Supervisors undid their previous action (with another 5-0 vote and virtually no debate). Now assistant sheriffs will again be required to have a minimum of two years as a Captain before they can hold that position.
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Here’s another fun fact about the whole tawdry affair: before leaving “America’s Sheriff” placed himself on paid administrative leave (at full salary) while he’s dealing with his legal troubles. (The County Supervisors are trying to decide what, if anything, they are going to do about this.) Oh, and with all this the local Republican Party still has not yet made an official request for Carona to resign. My, my boys and girls--how positively “Democratic Party” of you…

Beowulf: an Animated New Take on an Ancient Myth

I will be reviewing the new animated movie Beowulf so I chose a fractal called Odin. (I did a whole series of fractals representing Gods of various pantheons: since Odin is mentioned in the movie I decided to use it as my image for today‘s post.) Again, I’m stretching a bit to come up with an image for my post but I gotta do what I gotta do to put something up for you.
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Beowulf is a true “classic”. It may well be the oldest surviving work of “English” literature--so old in fact that it is written in Old English from even older oral sources. Frankly I’m surprised it took this long to bring the movie to the big screen: the story of a lusty barbarian slaying monsters and becoming king seems ripe for the big screen.
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This new animated version of Beowulf departs somewhat from the source material to flesh out and connect the two stories. King Hrothgar (Anthony Hopkins) has just built a new “Mead Hall” to celebrate his many victories. But the celebration is ruined by the untimely arrival of the gigantic, misshapen monster Grendel (voiced by Crispin Glover speaking what sounds like old English) who uses the king’s guests as after-dinner snacks. Blond and buff barbarian Beowulf (Ray Windstone) and his men arrive to save th day, slaying the monster after a spectacular battle. The celebration after the monster’s death is ruined by another collection of grisly murders. Horthgar reveals that Grendel has a mother--and she’s angry!
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Here the movie departs from the source-myth. Horthgar has a secret (which I won‘t reveal here) but sends the hero out over the objections of his trusted advisor Unferth (John Malkovich in “high snivel“ mode). Beowulf confronts the demon mother (Angelina Jolie in a role tailor-made for her). Beowulf strikes a “devil’s bargain that wins him a kingdom and everything he could desire--including the old king’s beautiful queen Wealthow (Robin Wright-Penn). Many years later the bargain is broken and Beowulf is forced into final battle with a dragon.
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Director Robert Zemeckis uses the same “motion capture” animation technique he used in The Polar Express. Two years of new technology has made the look of Beowulf somewhat better. Still, the human figures have a rather “Barbie”-like look and their flat dead eyes are somewhat creepy. As a whole the movie is beautifully animated and the battle scenes are nothing short of spectacular. The story is somewhat predictable (even with the new twist) and the dialog is frankly cheesy. Still, it makes for a delightfully fun, if campy, romp.
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Beowulf isn’t quite a classic but well worth seeing for what it is. Some parents may be lured into taking young children to the movie because it is an animated feature. This movie though is NOT for children! It is loaded with graphic (if somewhat cartoonish) violence and brimming with (animated) nudity. If this had been shot with “live” actors Beowulf would have gotten an “R” Rating instead of “PG13”. It is not a movie for young children or those with delicate sensibilities but a lot of those who like action movies.
FINAL GRADE: A-

"Tempests" in a Teapot

You’d think with the thousands of fractals I’ve done that at least one would be called “Tempest” (or some variation)--but, No! So instead I settled on one called Sunset Storm: I think the image is pretty and today’s post will talk about several “tempest-in-a-teapot” stories floating around the news. (“Tempest” is another word for “storm”--thus the connection.) ANYway--on with the rant!
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Lets get to the really salacious stuff first… Who remembers those pix of Boxing Champ Oscar de la Hoya wearing women’s underwear? (Those that do--how many of you, like me, wish you could forget???) Turns out super-hot Siberian Exotic Dancer (that’s STRIPPER folks!) Milana Dravnel, 22, is filing a ONE HUNDRED MILLION DOLLAR suit against de la Hoya for alleged fraud, defamation, interference with contract, infliction of emotional distress and undue influence. (Remember folks--SHE was the one who sold the photos and went on every TV Show that would book her.) De la Hoya insists the photos were “doctored” and hasn’t really suffered much because of the scandal.
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I wanna know how this broad thinks she can get any cash out of the guy! If indeed, as she alleges, de la Hoya had “fake FBI Agents” harassing her it seems to be a job for the Police--but no! She goes straight for the money? Oh yeah--we all believe she was harassed and intimidated--NOT! In the end this is just another tempest in a teapot. Nobody cares whether Oscar de la Hoya likes to wear women’s undies or not: the only person who should care is Oscar’s wife (and she should care because he was in frolicking in a hotel with a stripper.) As for you Milena--it’s time for you to climb back up your pole and out of our lives babe. Your “fifteen minutes” are definitely over!
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Our next tempest involves Lakers Coach Phil Jackson regarding a comment he made after his team was thorough whupped by the San Antonio Sours. (Here’s a link to a story that features the comment: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M-NLzjcA3kM .) The Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD) was instantly up-in-arms over the comment as Jackson was quick to apologize. (Use this link to hear Jackson’s apology on ESPN http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C-m0xfdID34 .) He was quickly reprimanded (but not fined) by the NBA.
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So--why is this a “tempest-in-a-teapot” story? It’s true that all professional sports are frankly homophobic (however much they pretend not to be). Phil Jackson though is no more “anti-Gay” then anyone else in Professional Basketball. He was playing to his audiences (and the crowd of reporters certainly laughed). Do we fault him for a lapse in taste and/or judgment? I hope not. GLAAD really needs to save their indignation for something that really matters so their complaints won’t be so diluted. If anyone should be upset it should be for Jackson's half-assed apology. (No consequences equals no contrition.)
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Our final “tempest-in-a-teapot” story comes from the John McCain campaign in Hilton Head North Carolina where one of his supporters (Check out this link to view the incident in context http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WLQGWpRVA7o .) I wasn’t able to find the name of the woman who made the comment but I saw a bit on Inside Edition where she states she “hates” Hillary Clinton and thinks she is “diabolical”. For McCain’s part he simply looked flustered and tried to laugh it off. He ended up saying he respected “anyone who gets the nomination for the Democratic Party.” A number of groups were quick to criticize him for not denouncing the comment.
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Personally, I have to confess that I’ve lost a lot of respect for John McCain after watching him change his stance on several issues dear to my heart just to go after conservative Republican votes. Still, I feel sorry for the guy here: he was clearly caught off guard in an unscripted moment (and I wonder how any of us would do were we caught in the same situation.) I’m saddened that our political process has sunk so law that we (no matter what side we’re on) resort to name-calling. (Come on people! We got over that by the time we were in High School--or at least should have!) I also wonder what those who objected to his comments (or lack thereof) were thinking when they raised a fuss: doing so is just like handing conservative pundits rocks and telling them to chuck away. Not to bright…
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But in the end who I really feel sorry for is us as a nation. We’re so wrapped up in our “tempest-in-a-teapot” stories that we don’t even think about the really important things in life. Still--I love these stories and frankly I enjoy getting my dander up about them. Ah well--I guess I’m no better than anyone else. Bring on the sleaze!

Bad Seat Spoils "Pajama"

You have to follow a “chain of associations” to figure out why I chose DUVET as the fractal for today’s post. For those of you who might not know “Duvet” is a fancy word a quilt. Quilts usually go on beds and one wears pajamas to bed. Today I will be reviewing the Musical Theater West production of THE PAJAMA GAME and the chain is complete. ANYway--on with the review!
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Bad seats can really spoil your enjoyment of a show: Robyn and I had seats slightly off center in the fourth row of Carpenter Center and yet my seat was “bad”. As soon as I sat down I knew I was going to be in trouble: the seat was canted about fifteen degrees downward so I began a slow slide forward until butt was poised on the edge of the seat and my shoulders were soon against the seat back--but nothing else was supported! I ended up bracing my feet so using my arms as anchors so I wouldn’t slide. I didn’t move but my muscles started cramping almost immediately. Luckily I was able to move to a different seat fir Act Two but I’m afraid it rather colored my opinion of the entire show. But enough about my viewing experience. On with the review!
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THE PAJAMA GAME is the stuff of Broadway legend: the show (based on the novel 7 1/2 CENTS by Richard Bissel) was offered to famous composer Frank Loesser (of GUYS AND DOLLS fame) but he was unavailable. He recommended neophyte “pop” composers Richard Adler and Jerry Ross (who went on to write DAMN YANKESS the next year). The show also helped launch the careers of Choreographer Bob Fosse and Shirley MacLaine who lived the “Chorus Girl becomes a Broadway Star” when she stepped into a featured role when another actress was injured. The show went on to win the Tony Award for “Best Musical” of 1954, became a motion picture and was a multiple “Tony” winner when it was revived in 2004. The most well-known songs from the show include “Hey There” (You With the Stars in Your Eyes…”). “Steam Heat and “Hernando’s Hideaway.”
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The show is a love story set against the backdrop of labor troubles in a Pajama factory. The union is threatening to strike over their demands for a 71/2 cent an hour wage increase (ah for the days when that actually made a difference in the salary!) but management is determined not to give in. Newly-arrived middle-manager Sid Sorokin falls for “Grievance Committee” Chair Babe Williams, She’s spunky, sparky and totally devoted to the Union. Jealous “Time Study Expert” Norman Hines is carrying on with the flirty-ditzy secretary Gladys.
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To me, this production is a little threadbare: yes, the show is set in a factory but this minimal set looks slapped together. (I was close enough to see conspicuous gaps in the construction--not a good thing.) There aren’t as many dance numbers as I’d have expected: the ones the cast does do look good if they are a bit repetitive. (Every production numbers has a couple of guys doing tumbling runs across the stage.) The costumes didn’t thrill me but they convey the feel of the period. As always, the “Pit Band” (this time under the direction of Daniel Thomas) was first rate. I don’t know how many people were in the Orchestra but they rocked it out.
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Paul Dean, as Sid, is good looking and has a magnificent voice. The duet with his own recorded voice on “Hey There” is one of the high points of the show. He isn’t given much to work with in this part and he still underplays his role. He also seemed to be unable to quite keep up with the groups dance numbers. Darcie Roberts (Babe) does a fine job with her role. Nick Degruccio is a fine comic dancer and singer who is suitably frenetic in his role as Hines. Terra C. McCloed has a great role as “Gladys”: it’s easy to see why this role could make a star--hot dance number and a great “drunken” scene… Robert Pieranuzi as “Prez” is an excellent comedian and Vonetta Mixon steals every scene she’s in as “Mabel.” Nils Anderson channels “Jerry Stiller” as factor owner “Mr. Hassler.” The ensemble does a fine job supporting the lead and featured roles and they do well with what they are given.
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In the end I have to ask myself--did I not enjoy THE PAJAMA GAME because of my “bad” seat or was it the show itself or just this production? Honestly, I don’t know: I know I enjoyed the second half a lot more than the first. (I overheard several similar comments on the way out and I can’t assume that they all had “bad” seats so maybe it was a flaw in the production.) I’m used to high quality productions from Musical Theater West and this show didn’t quite deliver.
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FINAL GRADE: C-

Let's Play "Post Awful"

Today’s post begins with a fractal called ALL AMERICAN. I picked it because there is nothing more “all-American” than the United States Postal Service: the image has a lot of red, is pointy and aggressive--just like I feel right now. Here’s the story of my protracted adventure trying to find what happened to a missing package…
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The adventure began Saturday November 3: I was out with the Titian-haired, ever luscious Robyn running our weekend errands. When we got home we found a little peach-colored card from the Post Office letting me know they were unable to deliver a parcel since a signature was required. I had the option of picking it up at the Post Office (some distance away, not easily gotten to) or requesting a re-delivery. Re-delivery seemed the best option so I promptly called 1-800 ASK-USPS and was directed into “Voice Mail Hell”. About 55 punches later (the tune was a rough approximation of “I Want To Rock and Roll All Night and Party Every Day” by Kiss) I learned that I needed to make said request with a LIVE OPERATOR (and the national office had already closed for the weekend).
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So I called back before 6:00 AM Monday morning and got through to a real person after another telephone keypad rendition of “I Want To Rock and Roll All Night and Party Every Day”: since I hadn’t called before 2:00 AM PST time I couldn’t get the package until Tuesday. (Never mind the fact that I needed to make the request through a live persona nd they were CLOSED unitl 5:00 AM PST Monday!!!) Tuesday came and Tuesday went and there was no package. My “regular” mail arrived but nary a sign of the errant parcel. I dialed the “800” number yet again (“I Want To Rock and Roll All Night and Party Every Day”) around 4:00 PM only to be told “we have until 5:00 PM your time to deliver the package. If you haven’t gotten it by then you’ll have to call back to schedule a re-delivery.” Then they hung up on me.
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SO--I called back at 5:01 PM and a nice lady took my re-delivery request--promising the package would be delivered the following day. Wednesday came--my regular mail arrived but no parcel! At 5:00 PM I made yet another call to their “help” (ha!) line. (By now I was getting pretty good at playing “I Want to Rock and Roll All Night…” on the telephone keypad so I was able to add some seriously wicked “air guitar“ moves to it.) This time a kid who sounded like he might have been 16 (at most) said he’d request another re-delivery!
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I told him “no” that WAS NOT an option. (“Sir--you don’t have to yell at me!” That’s not yelling kid!!!) “Isn’t there anything else I can do?” I asked as this annoying little twerp was fraying my last nerve. “Well--I suppose you could file a complaint… Someone who can help you will get back to you within one business day . . .” I readily agreed.
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This afternoon (11/8) I got a phone call form someone at my local P.O. We went through everything yet again and I gave the man on the other end of the line all the info I had. Sadly, I had everything but what he really needed to help me! (My Postal Carrier hadn’t bothered to write the “Tracking Number” on the card she left me--thus making my package untraceable. Later in the day another gentleman called me back so I told the story yet again! At least he had a helpful suggestion: call the company I’d ordered the item from and see if they had the elusive Tracking Number on file. (They didn’t.) At least he gave me a local number to call them so I didn’t have to deal with the “800” number--although I must confess to a certain sadness about not being able to do my “air guitar” moves one more time. (BTW--this Yahoo had to look up the phone number of the office he was working in.)
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Without a Tracking Number he can’t help me: the package is gone and they have no idea when/if it will re-appear. It may have been shipped back to the point of origin or it may have gone back into the mail stream--and from there it could have gone anywhere. My package may or may not re-appear at some time in the future--at this point it's anybody's guess...
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If there is a bright spot in this tragic tale it is this: at least I don’t have to pay for the item the "Post Awful" lost. If the package fails to show up here by November 14 (I wanted it by November 10) the company will re-ship me a new one at no additional charge. Hopefully the “Post Awful” will be more careful with this one because if they don't I'm afraid I'll have a meltdown. (I'd make a joke here about "disgruntled postal employees" here but it would probably get me in trouble.)
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Still, I find myself well and truly frustrated with the USPS. If my mail carrier had done her job properly in the first place there wouldn’t have been a problem. Their “800” number is less-than-helpful and some of the staff couldn’t care less about helping those who call for assistance. It’s no wonder Fed Ex and UPS are getting more and more business. Still they keep raising our rates: if this is an example of how well the USPS does there job on a regular basis they'd have been "out of business" a long time ago if they'd been a Corporation. Here’s hoping I don’t have to deal with the “Post Awful” again any time in the near future--say the next ten years or so…

Strange Bedfellows

You have to follow my chain of reasoning for choosing today’s fractal, CRAZY QUILT. But, once you hear my reasons I think you’ll find it makes perfect sense! A quilt is (usually) a bed covering: politics makes for strange bedfellows and this political pairing is strange--one might even say crazy! (See what I mean? It makes great sense!)
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I just heard a bit news that literally dropped my jaw--so much so that I feel like I needed to “blog” about it! Ultraconservative Televangelist Pat Robertson just announced he is endorsing Rudy Guiliani in the 2008 Presidential election. Why is this so odd? Guiliani is a political moderate--pro “Choice” and in favor of gay rights legislation. Robertson (who once said “Liberal judges are more dangerous to the United States than a few bearded terrorists flying airplanes into skyscrapers”) has political leanings somewhere to the right of Atilla the Hun.
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Any political observer worth their salt should be asking themselves “what’s up with this?” Is Robertson and his pals in the Christian Right mellowing their stance on abortion and gay rights? (Yeah right!) Does Robertson think he can “persuade” Guiliani to harden his stance on key issues? (Today’s politics demands a lot of “quid pro quo” so this seems highly likely to me.) Maybe it is simply the fact that Robertson feels Guilani has the best chance to win against Hillary Clinton or Barack Obama. Why didn’t Robertson go with Mitt Romney who has values right in line with the Christian Right? (Romney is a practicing Mormon, definitely not what Pat Robertson would call a “good” Christian but Guliani is a self-confessed adulterer and much-married. Such a choice for a Christian to have to make!)
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Personally, I think Robertson went with Rudy Guiliani for one reason and one reason alone. He thinks Guiliani can WIN! I don’t respect Robertson’s political views but I always believed he was committed to his concept of Christianity (however warped I think it might be). But with this move Robertson has sold out his own values and proven himself just to be another politico wrapping himself in the Bible to achieve his own ends. Whatever his reasoning, I’m sure this latest development will make for an interesting Presidential race in 2008.

Errata

No fractal today, just a quick correction. In my post I LOVE THE SMELL OF SCANDAL IN THE MORNING (November 2) I mistakenly referred to failed candidate LT. BILL HUNT as MIKE HUNT. I checked the name on several Internet sources and I still missed it. Many apologies for the mistake.

"Dogging" the Bounty Hunter

Today’s post begins with a fractal called Atomblast. I picked it because Dwayne “Dog the Bounty Hunter” Chapman did something that may well cause his career to implode after dropping the “N Bomb” several times in a recorded conversation. After watching the story play out for several days I finally decided I needed to put in my two cents.
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All Americans seen to love to raise folk up on a pedestal--and we love it just as much when our newly-created idols come crashing down. The most recent case of this is Dwayne “Dog” Chapman. He was a bounty hunter who parlayed several high-profile captures (chief among them Andrew Luster--an heir to the “Max Factor“ cosmetics fortune and multiple rapist) into a reality show on the “A&E” Channel. He was portrayed as a compassionate badass--a family man who prayed for his targets before he took them in. He was big on sermonizing to the perps--and even reputedly promised to keep in touch and help set them on the straight-and-narrow once they’d done their time.
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The show was hugely popular (at least by “basic cable” standards) and everything seemed to be going great until the National Enquirer got hold of a taped phone call between Dwayne and his son Tucker in which the famous bounty hunter repeatedly used the “N-word”. It seems the “N-word” is tossed around with regularity at the Chapman house: “Dog” was afraid that Tucker’s black girlfriend would report this and cause their “whole career to come crashing down”. Chapman said it wasn’t a racial slur but a comment on the girl’s character.
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This is just wrong on every level! Maybe it’s just me but I really don’t feel anyone should be tossing around the “N-word” lightly. When blacks use the word it gives racist whites the impetus to misuse it. The word doesn’t elevate anyone’s moral character and it only serves to raise bad feelings. A&E was shocked, shocked! that one of their stars had used such language (like their Production Crew had never heard him use the word while they were with him) and put Dog the Bounty Hunter on indefinite suspension. Chapman apologized for his use of the word (and had the good sense not to go on an “Apologymania“ Tour like Don Imus) but it doesn’t seem to have done him any good.
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But here’s the part of the story that amazes more than anything else--and doesn’t seem to be getting much play. Chapman’s son Tucker was the one who sold the tape to the Enquirer--not only selling out his father but his entire family! Tucker Chapman has been keeping a very low profile lately-- I’m sure nobody wonders why? (unless maybe he‘s afraid his Dad will kick his candy ass). Still, I’d love to hear his justification for this: was he blinded by love? Did he feel he needed to expose his father for the sake of justice? (yeah right!) Or was he just a gigantic brat who wanted to get back at his father for getting in his business? Honestly, I don’t know and I doubt I ever will. I’m just amazed that this kid could betray his family like that. Still, family betrayal is nothing new: the kid had to learn it from somewhere--and he very likely learned it from watching his parents in action.
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Will the “Political Correctness” Police manage to nail Dwayne “Dog” Chapman for good and all? I don’t know: a lot of people seem to think the whole thing is just a bit overblown (as do I--yet still I‘m blogging about it . . .) Still, it’ll be interesting to see how this one plays out--especially with the writer’s strike (but more about that later). I’ll certainly be watching . . .

I Love the Smell of "Scandal" in the Morning

Today’s post begins with a fractal called Coronal. I picked it because the title is almost an anagram for Carona--the last name of our current Orange County Sherriff. I know the connection is tenuous at best but it’s the best I could do for this one.
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Mike Carona is a third-term Sherriff here in the OC, popular with the public and a master of public relations. He somehow managed to get himself tagged as “America’s Sherriff”--thanks to the high profile Samantha Runyon child-abduction, rape and murder case. He is also a big-time politician, well-connected in the county and state Republican party. Sadly, he is also not above using his office to punish anyone who dared oppose him in an election.
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By this I’m talking about the 2006 election in which Sherriff’s Deputy Lt. Mike Hunt had the temerity to run against Carona. Carona had the blessings of the Orange County (and maybe even the state-wide) Republican political machine but Hunt still challenged him. Carona considered this “disloyal” and fought all the harder to get re-elected (even though he had promised to limit himself to two terms). After “America’s Sherriff” handily won that election Carona promptly moved to demote Lt. Hunt and removed him from his cushy post within the Sherriff’s Department. (NOTE: what Sherriff Carona did was completely legal: he was within his rights to make the move. Ethically--that’s another story. His decision was widely questioned by many.)
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So--why am I dragging up something that was over-and-done two years ago? Simple--Mike Hunt accused Sherriff Carona of “peddling favors” to his major contributors--favors like giving his supporters concealed weapon permits (outside of standard legal channels), appointing cronies to political positions then giving them and their families special treatment when they had legal trouble. (The OC Sherriff’s Department severely botched the rape case against Greg Haidl and two others: Greg Haidl is the son of former OC Assistant Sherriff Don Haidl--a former "close friend" and political appointee of Carona’s.) Around the same time Assistant Sherriff George Jaramillo (another former friend of the Sherriff) was indicted on a number of charges, Both Haidl and Jaramillo were eventually charged and convicted. During his investigation, Jaramillo alleged the Sherrif's hands were none too clean either. Wednesday October 31, Sherriff Mike Carona, his wife Deborah and alleged "long-time mistress" Debra Hoffman were all indicted on Federal Corruption charges. (FUL LITTLE ASIDE: Debra Hoffman was the former law partner of George Jaramillo.)
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Sherriff Carona “vehemently denies” all charges (of course) and says that he is “looking forward” to defending himself in court where he expect to be “fully exonerated’ once he “explains” his side of the story. (Right now at least) his bigwig Republican allies are fully supporting him. (We‘ll see what happens as time goes on and more info comes out.) Is he guilty? I don’t know: I believe that he is an arrogant, vengeful man who has made a number of “questionable” ethical decisions in his career but that doesn't necessarily make him guilty. The Department of Justice conducted a long investigation and a Grand Jury believed there was enough evidence to charge him. I have to assume the Feds have something more than the word of a couple of convicted felons on which to base their case--but we’ll never know until trial, will we? Even if he isn’t found guilty the Sherriff’s reputation will be tainted for a very long time to come and I doubt Carona will be supported for higher political on the state or national level. I’ll be watching this one closely to see how it all plays out in the end. It should be--very interesting! God, I love the smell of “scandal” in the morning!

I Married a "Crypto-Republican"

I picked today’s fractal, Ryngs, because it looked a bit like an abstraction of a pair of wedding rings. As you have no doubt seen by the title, this post involves me and my missus so the image seemed singularly apropos. Ah well--on with the rant!
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Every family has at least one shameful secret. Last week I discovered mine. Yes, I thought the love of my life was committed to “center-left” values--but no! I found out last week that I married a Crypto-Republican!
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How did I discover this, you ask? It happened like this…
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My nephew Glenn Keskey (whom I call “Glenn-Bob” for reasons unknown even to me) sent me an e-mail that provided a tool to help you select your presidential candidate. Yes, it’s very early to start thinking about who do vote for in 2008 (even though the California Primary is coming up in four months) so time marches ever onward. It’s not too early to start thinking about this: more than any election in the past 30 years, this one is particularly important.
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Check out this link to take the test. (http://www.wqad.com/Global/link.asp?L=259460 ) You will be asked questions about your opinions on Iraq, immigration, the Republican-sponsored tax cuts of 2001 and 2003, Stem-Cell research, universal health care, abortion, the privatization of Social Security, the Line-Item Veto, alternate energy, same-sex marriage and the death penalty. You will also asked to assess the importance of each issue. When completed the computer will figure out which candidate most-closely matches your positions.
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I took the quiz and found, to my complete surprise that my candidate-of choice is Dennis Kucinich (with a score of 46), John Edwards (42) and Chris Dodd (39). Unfortunately, none of these candidates have a hope in hell of winning the Democratic Party nomination--much less the next election. Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton both come in at 36 and Rudy Guiliani with a score of 32. (Mitt Romney was next in line at 17.)
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Robyn took the same test and we discovered her candidate was John McCain! Of course, her match was only 32 (I assume out of a possible 100). The quiz we both took isn’t completely accurate: for example she found John McCain disagreed with her on many of the most important issues of this campaign. (I wish I’d gotten the rest of her scores but I didn’t think to do that).
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Later (10/27) Robyn re-took the test wit a lot of input from me: this time she came out with results much closer to what I had (Kucinich, Edwards and Dodd--although with much less emphasis.) Did I brow-beat her into changing her opinions or did I simply encourage her to really think about the questions rather than going with her gut instincts? I don’t know and, honestly I’m not sure Robyn really does either. I guess we’ll never really know.
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What I do know for certain is this: the 2008 Presidential election (now barely more than a year away) may well be the most important vote in my lifetime. I know a lot of voters aren’t as well-informed as they should be: they vote with their guts or are swayed by expensive advertising campaigns and don’t take the time to think what that vote means to them and the country.
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The President can’t make a lot of changes on his own--even if his party controls congress. However, the next President may be asked to appoint as many as five Supreme Court Justices. Right now the court is almost equally divided between “conservatives” and “moderates”. Continuing this would pretty much leave in tact a lot of laws we have been dealing with for thirty or more years. A shift to conservative Justices would dismantle a lot of laws we’ve been living with for thirty years or more--chief among them Roe-v-Wade. These decisions will affect us all directly so participating in the voting process is important.
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For all of our sakes I hope you make the right decision.

Scenes From a Smoky Day

Today’s post begins with a fractal image called Fire Flower. I picked it because it made me think about what I was writing. What follows are two scenes from what I experienced on a smoky Wednesday (October 24) . I am nowhere near any of the fires burning in Southern California but our neighborhood has been seeing the affects all day--the first time that has happened. I couldn’t photograph what I saw so I wanted to paint a word picture. I hope it works. . .
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SEEN ON A SMOKY MORNING
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I feel like I'm living on an alien planet right now or maybe I've somehow wandered into a "Plein Air" painting . . .
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White clouds are feathering the sky like the pinfeathers of an angel's wing against a steel-blue sky. Swirls of red-brown smoke dance in almost paisley-lke precision from horizon to horizon. The rising sun is a burnished brass ball throwing slate-colored shadows behind trees and buildings. Everything is lightly shrouded in mists--and for a moment I am walking through my own waking dream. Leaves on the many trees have taken on an almost metallic quality but the grass and shrubs shine almost like they are lit from within by neon. Yellows and greens shine hotly but oranges and browns look muddy and drab: shades of blue and purple have gone gray and flat. My nose picks up the scent of salt on the breeze: it is the smell of redemption and renewal. I want to cry : I want to sing a dirge but the misty silence enfolds me in a tender embrace so instead I send a prayer to the skies…
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APOCOLYPSE IN THE AFTERNOON
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The sky has become a pale iron-colored bowl overhead and the crimson sun burns feebly, trying to light the day. The still air is hot and thickly-most as it surrounds me in a close, overly-familiar yet still unwanted embrace. Again I walk through dream-created silence but my world is shattered by the sound of helicopters overhead: I cannot see them beneath the imagined shelter of the trees but I find myself imagining a flotilla of gigantic angry beetles.
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I move on down a street that has gone black and white: the pale colors are washed out and the dark ones can hardly be distinguished in the red light of advancing afternoon. Only a few bits of sun-lit new growth shine green and hot against the somber background. Again the peace of my world is shattered by a young man behind the wheel of a red sports car: it almost seems like it is on fire. The powerful engine growls like a feral jungle beast with the music providing a throbbing bass counterpart. Laughter from inside the vehicle echoes off the walls and the sound is hard and cruel. I turn for home glad of sheltering walls...

Craziness in the News: the Perils of Pet Rescue

Today’s post begins with a fractal called JESTER. I picked it because this story is just crazy.
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There has been a lot of news over the past week about Ellen DeGeneres and her problems with the “Mutts and Moms” pet rescue organization. She and gal-pal Portia de Rossi entered to an adoption agreement with the organization to get a puppy. A provision of the contract the two signed required them to return the dog should they decide not to keep the animal for any reason. (I can speak with some authority to tell you that this happens with almost every dog rescue group as a matter of course.) In this case the placement didn’t work out but rather than return the dog DeGeneres and de Rossi passed the animal on to someone else. Three weeks later the rescue agency found out and decided to exercise their legal right to reclaim the dog. A three hour standoff (including a call to the Police) ended with the adoption agency taking the dog.
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That story is sad enough but there’s more: Ellen was clearly distraught when she told the nation about it on Tuesday October 16 on her daytime talk show: she begged the agency to return Iggy the dog to the distraught family. Mutts and Moms, however, had already placed the dog with someone else--and said they wouldn’t have placed Iggy with the family in any case. (They have a policy of not pacing small dogs with any family with children under the age of 14: the family had two girls aged twelve and ten.) Mutts and Moms have since chosen to shut down their web site because of the vast numbers of negative mail from angry Ellen fans. (Some fans have gone so far as to make death threats according to Mutts and Moms co-owner Marina Batkis.)
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Let me just say ther’s a whole Parade of Stupid going on here: Ellen DeGeneres (and I have to assume Portia de Rossi) have had enough experience with animal rescue agencies so surely they knew about the provision in the contract. (Animal Rescue groups are always very up front about their return policies.) Mutts and Moms is completely within their rights to do what they did--but from what I’ve seen Batkis and her associates went about it in the worst possible way for everyone involved. Iggy got a new placement in under 48 hours (which I found a bit suspicious). Getting the publicists involved (and I’m not saying whether Ellen did it or some over-zealous employee decided to take that on themselves) is another unit in the Parade of Stupidity. Sadly, I've learned through personal experience that those involved with animal rescue can often be arbitrary and capricious--but that tends to happens with fanatics. Lastly, I find it horrifying that fans get so exorcised as to make death threats against someone who is trying to do the right thing--even if it is in a misguided way.
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DeGeneres and de Rossi did a dumb thing but honestly I think their heart was in the right place. Marina Batkis compounded the dumbness when she decided to strictly enforce her organization’s policies: she could have examined them home where Iggy was placed to make a determination whether or not it was suitable. I think she decided to play Quien es mas macho with the DeGeneres camp and everyone lost. All the parties involved (with the possible exception of the family who took Iggy from DeGeneres) should be ashamed of themselves. This tawdry affair has made it worse for every animal rescue group out there.
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And as for you crazed fans--lighten up people!