Spamalot: a Send-up and Homage To Broadway

I chose Medal as today's fractal mainly because Spamalot has now taken the prize as my favorite musical. Besides--I really couldn't think of a better fractal for this review and I had no idea what to make for a new image.
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Seeing Spamalot live on stage was one of the first items on my personal "Bucket List": I would have loved to see the show on Broadway and I was scheming to make a trip to Las Vegas when it took over from Avenue Q in Las Vegas at The Wynn Resort. That never quite happened but the inclusion of this year's Broadway Season at the Orange County Performing Arts Centre was the main reason we bought season tickets this year. On Saturday October 17 we finally got to see the show.
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Spamalot is basically a re-telling of Monty Python and the Holy Grail--a low budget comedy movie that was made back in the early 1970s. It's a comedic retelling of the legend of King Arthur filtered through a peculiarly "Pythonesque" lens. All the humor fans loved is still here--along with a whole range of production numbers that bloom literally out of nowhere. (It IS a send-up of Broadway as well as the Arthurian legend after all.) All the scenes you loved from the movie are here--the French Taunters, the Vorpal Bunny and the Black Knight all turn up. So too does the music from the movie--Always Look On The Bright Side of Life and Brave Sir Robin.
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With the exception of King Arthur (played to pompus perfection by John O'Hurley) and the Lady Of The Lake all the Actors play multiple roles. With the exception of O'Hurley they are all "no names"--or at the very least names I don't recognize. Still, they manage to make that "Python" convention work for them: they keep the pace lively so you never quite get a chance to fixate on the show's weak points. (More on that later.)
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The Broadway Musical gets the Python treatment as well: huge production numbers pop out of literally nowhere (but at least that gives them an excuse to get a collection of scantily-clad chorus girls on stage.) The Song That Goes Like This exposes the structure of the "big" ballad that has anchored virtually every Broadway Musical since 1980 (and even manages to take a few shots at Andrew Lloyd Webber). In the end the "Fourth Wall" is gleefully shattered as the cast realizes they are IN a Broadway Play and a big, gushy "Broadway Wedding" finishes off the show.
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There are a few spots that expose this as a "touring" production. Effects that were HUGE on the New York stage come off as small and a little cheap--but maybe that was an homage to the original material. (After all, the "Pythoners" only had a shoestring budget to work with.) Still, these moments are few and far between so you can forgive the show that. I also could have done with the cast waiting for the audience to finish laughing before they went on with their lines--but if they had the show probably would have run for an extra hour.
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Spamalot is a must see for fans of Python and Broadway both. Yes, it's just a whipped-up confection of nothing but it's just FUN and a wonderful theatrical divertisment. GO SEE IT!!!
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FINAL GRADE: A

A Movie In The Garden

I chose In The Garden as today's fractal image because I saw a movie "in the garden." (Actually, it wasn't really a "garden" but read on and you'll see the connection.)
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I've been hearing about "Victoria Gardens" since we moved to the I.E. but never gotten a chance to visit. Turns out the place is something of an upscale shopping center (at least by Riverside/San Bernadino standards). The colors are Tuscan-inspired (like most shopping centers these days) and the buildings have that textured contemporary style you see all over these days. The designers decided to do something different in their plan though--they put one-lane streets through the shops and lining them with parallel-parking spaces (to give the feeling of an old-style "Main Street." IMHO, this is a decidedly mixed blessing: parking close to your location (assuming you are lucky enough to find a space) costs and there are police patrolling the area looking for expired meters. Then you have the problem of pedestrians who simply don't pay attention to the cars--and that can lead to trouble.
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We had a bit of a heart-stopping experience while we were trying to find some place to park. A young lady was busily texting away--looking neither left or right and not taking her eyes off her Blackberry (or whatever she was using) stepped out in front of us and we nearly ran her over. Luckily we were a bit lost so Robyn was creeping along so we were able to slam on the brakes and avoid an accident. (I don't even think this chica realized hwo close she came to being run over. Still, it threw a bit of cold water on our enthusiasm and we ended up not wanting to explore as much as we had intended.
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Luckily, the AMC Theater was fairly cose to where we parked (and good signage helped direct us there quickly and efficiently). Couples Retreat was starting in about half an hour so we decided to see that. The plot is pretty predictable: four couples travel to paradise to "work on their relationships" which end up worse than when they arrived until things magically work themselves out and everyone ends up happily-ever-after. Vince Vaughn (one of the writers) plays video-game salesman Dave as a rehash of his character from Four Christmases (a snarky, self-involved schlub with an impossibly-hot wife). Jon Favreau is happily cheating on his wife (who is happily cheating on him). Jason Bateman is Jason--a control freak who is so uptight he creates "Power Point" presentations for everything. Faizon Love plays recently-divorced Shane (and how many fat black men do you know named Shane?) is still trying to get over his wife while hooking up with 20 year-old hottie Trudy. (And again, how many 20 year-old black girls do you know who are named Trudy?)
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The movie starts slowly (so much so I fell asleep) and none of the characters are either original or all that likeable. The plot was completely contrived and there was nothing unexpected anywhere in the film: still, good charactes and lively acting can overcome the lamest plots--and they almost make it here. Still, once the movie got to Bora Bora the action picked up (and the scenery was nothing short of spectacular). Yes, there were a lot of laughs but I felt I was laughing AT characters rather than WITH them. There were some funny secondary characters who have good bits during the movie but they don't make a lot of impact.
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In the end, I kinda liked the movie. Robyn liked the movie but didn't love it. Still, the audince (most twenty-to thirty-somethings) really seemed to enjoy it. If you are a fan of Vince Vaughn you should definitely run out to see Couples Retreat or you just have a pleasant afternoon to waste it's worth the price of a matinee ticket. Leave the kids at home because the language is raw and the situations might be a bit raw for youngsters.
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FINAL GRADE: B-

Breathing New Life Into Classic Literature

Today's post begins with a new fractal image called Ancient Artifact. I chose it mainly because it reprents something old--dare I even say classic. This image was one of the first I created with the reinstalled Mind Boggling Fractals program which breathed new life into my creating fractals. Maybe the post will help breathe some new life into classic literature.
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Saturday morning Robyn and I were on our weekly shopping trip to Costco. We'd also decided to get our flu shots there that day (since they are less than anywhere else we could go). But we got to the store early (so we could find parking) and the flu shots didn't start for a while so we had time to kill. Being bibliophiles we both drifted over to the book section to see what was there. (Usually we don't find much since the store tends not to stock the type of material we're interested in reading but sometimes we unearth a gem.) This time we ran across a title called Pride and Prejudice and Zombies.
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Those of you with at least a nodding acquaintance with English Literature know that Pride and Prejudice was one of the classic "Regency Romances" by Jane Austen. Once upon a time you couldn't have escaped a high-school lit. class without reading at least ONE Austen novel (or at least the Cliff Notes thereof). Now she, and her compatriots have rather fallen out of favor with everyone but a few young leadies of a certain temperment and Miramax Films. Still, these lush, potboilers were once considered high art and I think we may have lots something now that Jane and her cohorts have fallen out of fashion.
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Seth Grahame-Smith, author of such dubious classics as How To Survive A Horror Movie and The Spider-Man Handbook came up with an ingenius way to update Pride And Prejudice--by adding zombies! I mean--really people--what musty old classic WOULDN'T be improved by a judicious addition of those loveable shuffling, undead brain-eaters? I can think of one--with the possible exception of Goodnight Moon (which is plenty creepy enough in its own right.) He also kicked up War Of The Worlds (by H.G. Wells) by adding "blood guts and zombies" there too--but for some reason thought "Sea Monsters" would be a better fit for Sense And Sensibility.
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Personally, I think Seth is on to something here--or maybe just ON something. (Since I've never met the guy I can't make a value judgement.) Mister Grahame-Smith may have unwittingly created a literary cottage industry for himself by reinvigorating the classics. Of course zombies--lovable as they are--could grow stale afte a while. Why not go a bit further afield? On the off chance the author might really be "on something" I have thoughtfull provided a few suggestions for further novels. (Of course, proper remuneration should be forthcoming--but that's only a formality.) Without further ado--I submit these possibilities...
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TOM SAWYER VAMPIRE HUNTER: there's no reason why Mark Twain's loveable scamp SHOULDN'T encounter Vampires in Hanibal Missouri. After all--they seem to be everywhere else...
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HUCKLEBERRY FINN: THE ALIEN ABDUCTION TAPES: OK the anal probling might be a bit much for a few readers--but a few readers would really like it.
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A TALE OF TWO CITIES AND NUCLEAR TERRORISM: yes, it walks away from "creatures of the night" but a good "nuclear attack" story can be a nice potboiler
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TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD AND A ZOMBIE: really--what else do you need to say?
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THE OLD MAN AND THE SEAMOSTER: that one is just obvious.
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THE HOUSE OF SEVEN VAMPIRES: lets face it--Nathaniel Hawtorne needs all the hel[p he can get! Adding some ghouls or a zombie infestation to THE SCARLET LETTER wouldn't hurt either. (Anything but that ridiculous Demi Moore update!)
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Why limit the idea to classic literature? Why not expand the idea to classic theater. Here are a few suggestions...
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ROMEO AND JULIET: THE NIGHTSIDE CHRONICLES. Vampire Romeo falls in love with beautiful werewolf Juliet in this truly star-crossed romance. Likewise HAMLET would be vastly improved by having the dead characters "rise" and ravage the audience in traditional zombie fashion.
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Since I'm mining Shakespeare why not reimagine a modern classic into ROSENCRANTZ AND GUILDENSTERN ARE ZOMBIES? You KNOW that would totally work on ANY stage!!!
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Last but not last Disney has taken over Broadway--why not add a little zombie mayhem to MARY POPPINS or a sea monster attack in THE LITTLE MERMAID? Or how 'bout if TARZAN had been raised by a tribe of vampires? That would be truly cool!
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Any or all of these would make WONDERFUL additions to classics of drama and literature. Think about it.
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'nuff said.

Adventures In Customer (DIS)Service

I chose Spinz 9 as the image for today's rant for several reasons. Like my story, it is long and convoluted and the color and shape suggest an orange. You'll find out why that's important in the next paragraph.
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In the current economic climate you would think businesses and institutions would want to be raising their customer service standards rather than lowering them. Such doesn't seem to be the case with the Orange County Performing Arts Center, at least if you go by the experience we just had...
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Earlier this year we got a flyer from the PAC touting the new Broadway Series. Since the package included Spamalot, Dream Girls and Young Frankenstein it was a foregone conclusion that we'd be buying. (They're also doing In The Heights, Xanadu and Spring Awakening but we don't care about those so much--and none of this information is relevant to the story anyway.) We ordered our tickets on Monday September 7. Then began the wait for our tickets...
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Since the cash was withdrawn from our account with such alacrity we thought surely our tickets would arrive in a timely fashion. One week passed--no tickets. Two weeks passed--still no tickets. Three weeks passed (with the show being two weeks away) and the tickets STILL hadn't arrived so we decided we needed to call the PAC to find out what was up. I was a bit surprised to find they didn't have an 800 Number to call but since their primary customers are local I could sort of accept it. Still, we called and promptly reached "Voice Mail Hell". None of the choices they offered us related to our problem and there didn't seem to be a way to connect to a live operator. Not really having a choice we made a random choice and hoped for the best. It took HALF AN HOUR for someone in the Box Office to pick up.
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Our Customer Service Agent Marquell (sp?) was nice enough and was willing to help out. Still, she couldn't tell us if, when, or where our tickets had been sent (although she WAS able to tell us we that our tickets had been paid for). She asked for a confirmation number (which I gave) but never asked for my name and address: I found this particularly surprising since I am clear NOT Robyn. She assured us that the tickets would be printed and sent out promptly. She then went on to tell us that should the tickets NOT arrive by October 16th we'd have call back YET AGAIN and they would have a set of tickets waiting for us at "Will Call."
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Needless to say I found this less than 100% satisfactory: they didn't offer us a special number to call so should we have to phone them YET AGAIN I'll have to go through "Voice Mail Hell" a second time! I don't know if you've ever picked up tickets at "Will Call" but it's not fun: there's only one window and lines can get long. Also, for us at least, "Will Call" isn't convenient to our seats so we'll be fighting crowds to get to our seats. The PAC made no offer to call US back to make sure the problem was resolved (which makes me wonder whether the Center has so many ticketing errors that they CAN'T stay on top of the problem. Still, I suppose I should be grateful it wasn't any more difficult.
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The Ahmundsen in Los Angeles and the Lyceum in San Diego both offer the same series and it really isn't that much further for us to drive, The experience left a bad taste in our mouths and we'll be thinking long and hard whether we want to buy the next series. We can only hope customer service improves...
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'nuff said.

Another Act At The (Assembly) Circus

I picked Circus Wheel as today's fractal mainly because this story is just too white-trash crazy to believe. It simply belongs at the circus. Here's the story...
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Republican Congressman Mike Duvall who represents parts of Orange County--an outspoken conservative and defender of "family values"--was caught recorded on an open microphone discussing (in graphic detail) sexual affairs with two married women. (One of the women happens to be a lobbyist who frequently testifies before the Utility Committee--of which Duvall was Vice-Chairman) The comments were made at a hearing in July but didn't come to light until this week.
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Needless to say, once the comments were made public Duvall was quick to resign his seat (amid rumors that one of his most powerful supporters was already out looking for a replacement.) You'd think that would be enough to end the problem but this scandal is going to go on for a while. There will be an investigation of his activities to see if the affair affected his voting record (Duvall's decisions were often in line with Sempra Energy--who employs the lobbyist he was supposedly involved with .) Will anything be proven? Only time will tell--but there are reports that Duvall was quite the "Player" in Sacramento and many thought it would only be a matter of time until his career imploded.
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Duvall said in his Resignation comments: “I am deeply saddened that my inappropriate comments have become a major distraction for my colleagues in the Assembly. It would not be fair to my family, my constituents or to my friends on both sides of the aisle to remain in office. Therefore, I have decided to resign.” Later he claimed he made it all up as if somehow that made it all better. Nowhere in either of these statements did he apologize to the women he named.
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Come on guy! Do you really think it's that much better to claim you like to talk dirty to other men? Does it somehow enhance your reputation with other Conservative Republican Lawmakers. (Assemblyman Jeff Miller of Corona is also in hot water with his own party for failing to report the comments.) Assuming you are telling the absolute truth you've trashed not only your own life but the lives of two innocent women. Do you even care about the damage you've done to them? Honestly, I doubt it by your conduct--but I could be wrong... Televised reports say Duvall's wife
aving none of it: she's locked him out of his own home.
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For me though--there's a broader question. Why is it OK for these "family values" types to put on a show of morality (and condemning others for misdeeds) while acting like pigs? Why is it OK for other "family values" types to sit by while someone like Duvall makes a mokery of their stands? (Personally, I'm guessing it's because they don't really believe their own line or theses men think they are too far aboive commonplace things to be bothered.) Either way, Mike Duvall not only disrespected himself, his constituents, his party and good decent women everywhere. Assuming he's telling the truth he also disrespected two innocent women and publicly trashed their lives. Mike Duvall--you got everything you deserved--and more!
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'nuff said

Ron And Robyn's Excellent Adventures In Auto Buying (or How Toyota Talked Us Into Buying A Honda

You have to follow an association chain to see why I picked Metallic Crosses as the fractal for today's post. The basic shape of the image is round (recalling a wheel) and cars are made of metal (mostly). Buying a car takes lots of cash (thus gold and silver as in coin) so on with the rant!

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Robyn and I come from the school of thought that says you keep a car until the upkeep and maintenance (gas, insurance and car repairs) outweighs the payments and upkeep of a new vehicle. Robyn's car has finally reached that point: "Snowflake" (my name for it) or "BBQ Western" (Robyn's) has serveed us well for a long time but it's time she goes to that big car lot in the sky.

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We had a long list of requirements for what we wanted in a new vehicle. 1) the care must be reliable. (Adventures in Auto Repair isn't a game we enjoy playing.) 2) we need decent hauling capacity. (We don't have to haul bulky items often but when we do need to carry something we REALLY need the space.) 3) the cabin must have enough room for both of us to ride in comfort and be fairly easy to enter and exit. (As we get older and fatter this becomes ever more important to both of us.) Ideally we'd like something that is (at least somewhat) fuel efficient (since I believe we're never going to see truly cheap gas again and we'd like to make a slight move toward a "greener.) In the end that pretty much moved us in to full-sized sedans or baby SUVs. Oh, and price is definitely a consideration.

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Several times over the past year we've rented a Kia Rondo to take for extended trips. (See above for why we didn't take the little car.) We found the Rondo to be the right combination of handling and space (plus being $5,000 less than a comparable Japanese vehicle we found it deserved consideration.) The vehicle is hardly stylish but the vehicle has everything we want in an affordable package. Even though I realize that K.I.A. is an acronym for "killed in action" we liked the vehicle enough that we thought we should throw it into the mix. Still, I was under the mistaken impression there wasn't a Kia Dealership within 40 miles we decided to confine ourselves to the "big three" Honda, Toyota and Nisan.

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The Nisan dealership here in Corona isn't convenient to us (and we had a bad experience with another Nisan dealer several years ago) so we quickly knocked them out of contention. (Also, I think the new Altima is pretty butt-ugly and the Rogue hasn't gotten good reviews so we decided not to waste our time looking.) Honda Cars of Corona is about two miles from our home so we started there: we took a look at the new Accord but didn't care for the body styling or the fact the thing was so darn wide so we quickly dropped that off the list. The CRV had the right mix of things we needed in a vehicle and the gas mileage wasn't TOO bad for the size of the vehicle. Paul, our salesman was helpful and low key so we had a pretty good experience. I didn't love the body style but by and large the vehicle worked for us so we left with a good feeling.

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Later that same day we went to Quality Toyota of Corona to look at the Camry and RAV-4. I can't say anything about the Camry that hasn't already been said. (It is the number-one selling car in the United States after all!) About the only thing I found to dislike about the Camry was the (seemingly) small trunk. Due to the "cash for clunkers" program they were very low on stock so there was only one drivable RAV-4 on the lot. I liked the vehicle a lot (slightly roomier than the CRV and better sight lines) but it became very obvious very quickly that there was something about Robyn seriously didn't like: we found out that we were test driving a V6 and the thing just had too much power for her. In the end they promised to let us know when they got some 4 cylinder models in to test.

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Yesterday morning (September 7) we headed back to check out a four-cylinder RAV-4. Robyn was much more comfortable with this version of the RAV-4 although neither of us were convinced that the RAV-4 was what we wanted. We also ended up checking out the Scion xD (which is a slightly smaller version of the RAV-4). We thought it had a nice body style and we were strangely charmed by the acid green paint job. (You won't see too many other cars like that in a crowded parking lot!) The xD gets better gas mileage than the RAV-4 and there was enough room for the haulage we'd need. It wasn't TOO overloaded with goodies (and was $5,000 less than its larger cousin.) There was ALMOST enough room for me (plenty of head room, adequate leg room and even room for my tummy. Sadly, I couldn't find a comfortable place to put my arms: I spent the whole test drive doing the "HIndhi-Cindi" trying to find a comfortable place to put my hands. We quickly came to the conclusion that this one just wasn't going to work...

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We were about ready to head home when I thought why don't we see if they have a "newer" used car? That way we'll avoid eating the depreciation and we'll still get a good car. Wonder of wonders they did! They took us over to a 2007 RAV-4 that was a thousand bucks more than the 2009 model we'd just driven! They told us this was a "Sport" model (upgraded interior, stereo, and fancy-schmancy wheels. Still, the interior was solid black (NOT a good thing for a desert climate!) It was nice but neither of us wanted to make a deal. Still, when our salesman said, "let us run some numbers" I agreed to it. (Stupid me!)

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Thus began the part of car buying I truly HATE! Running the credit check didn't take long and it told me about what I expected to hear. Robyn's credit score is OK, not great due largely to some bills that went astray during our move last year. (Late payments stay on your credit report for three years--and they really bring the score down!) After we sat and waited for about forty minutes they came back with a deal that was nothing short of shocking. ($450 monthly payments FOR FIVE YEARS and that was after a proposed $10,000 down payment and a $4,500 rebate from Toyota.) We said we weren't going to do that and suddenly the monthly payments dropped to $350. When we wouldn't go for that we brought in the big guy. (His name was Juan and he was determined to make the deal.)

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He was all "lets get this deal started" but Robyn and I both had stated quite plainly WE WOULDN'T BE BUYING A CAR that day! Every time we'd tell him "no" he'd come up with another suggestion...

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"Can you come up with a thousand dollars now?"

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"NO!"

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"What if we delayed for first payment for 55 days? You can take the car now..."

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"NO!"

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"Can you--?"

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"NO!"

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What about--?"

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"NO!"

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"Would you like us to--?"

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"NO!

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"We could--?"

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"NO! NO! NO!" What part of "no" don't you guys understand? We have always been up front about the fact that we intended to go through Costco for our financing and the deal itself (although we'd let Toyota see if they could come up with a better deal) It was frustrating and frankly it annoyed both of us to the point where we won't be buying a Toyota (or at least from that Toyota dealership.

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In the end though--we DID learn some valuable lessons. We learned NOT to go to a car dealership without first having our financial ducks in a row and we also learned to never, Never, NEVER let a car dealer "run some numbers." Our quest to buy a new (or a newer used) car continues and I will no doubt be writing Ron And Robyn's Excellent Adventures In Auto Buying: Part Deux sometime in the coming weeks. Stay tuned. But until then...

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'nuff said.

Now That Disney Has Taken Over Marvel Comics...

I chose Fandango as today's post because the fractal is a fanciful image and this post is a mere flight of fancy. The image is purely "fun"--as I hope this post will be. (Frankly, I could use a little lighthearted amusement in my life these days.) SO--let's dive in, shall we?

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The entertainment world was abuzz today (August 31) with the announcement that the Walt Disney Company will be acquiring Marvel Comics. Execs at Disney feel this is a good move because Marvel characters appeal primarily to boys while the Disney characters are skewed largely toward young girls. (Yes parents, Disney will soon own the collective psyches of ALL your children!) Shares of Marvel Comics jumped $10 on the news (and you can be sure Disney would never have made the deal if they didn't feel it would enhance their bottom line). Still, if f you the business details go look them up for yourself: this post is about something more frivolous. Read on and you'll find otu what...

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Marvel and Disney are both NOTORIOUs for cross-promotion: that got me thinking--now that Marvel and Disney are under the same roof it's only a matter of time before Marvel and Disney characaters start being featured together. Being a fan of both Disney AND Marvel Comics I came up with a few ideas...

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Marvel's version of Hercules and the other Olympian Gods is replaced by the animated Disney version. Herc juins the Avengers and Phil the Satyr comes along as team trainer.

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Ariel the Little Mermaid, is revealed to be the long-lost cousin of Prince Namor--the Sub-Mariner. Subby has to lose is fish-scale speedo and a lot of his angst while Ariel becomes more edgey.

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Mulan becomes th new incarnation of Mantis and becomes one of the core members of the World Avengers.

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Doctor Strange adds Ursula the Sea Witch, Malefecent and the Wicked Queen to his rogues gallery. Clea becomes an apprentice to the Blue Fairy...

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Kitty Pryde becomes Disney's first Jewish-American Disney Princess.

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The Beast batles Hulk for the heart of Belle in the 12-part maxi-series It's Not Easy Being Green. Kermit D Frog guest stars.

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Scrooge McDuck becomes Chairman of the Board of Stark Enterprises--and has his own battle suit made. He becomes Iron Duck!

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Wanda Maximoff (the Scarlet Witch) becomes tutor to the kids of the Wizards of Waverly Place in the new comic Witch and the Wizards.

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Sue Storm takes yet another leave of absense from the Fantastic Four and is replaced by Minnie Mouse.

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Marvel/Disney releases their new flagship title, The New Inhumans--Mickey Mouse, Donald Duck, Goofy, Lockjaw and Tinkerbell.

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Hannah Montana fronts a band called The New Mutants--super-powered rock-and-rollers who fight crime while making radio-friendly pop-rock ballads. (Of course, Hannah will be re-cast since Miley Cyrus is too old and too famous to play the part any longer.)

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Captain America (Steve Rogers) becomes on of the instructors at Camp Rock...

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So Marvel/Disney (Msney? Divel?), there are a few suggestions for your characters. Use any or all--but remember where you got them from. I'm available to write or produce the product. Call me!

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'nuff said