Picking a fractal for today‘s review of The Other Boleyn Girl was harder than it seemed. I’ve already used most of my of “royal” images (A Regal Image, Corona) so I needed to move somewhere else. Thus I chose Crown of Stars 26. I thought the colors were suitably rich and the shapes wonderfully baroque. The “crown” conjures images of royalty and there were several real “stars” in the movie. So--on with the review!
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It was inevitable that the story of Henry VIII would be brought to the screen: after all the guy had six wives, hordes of mistresses and had a history of changing friends as often as his mood changed (then offing the former close friends on trumped-up charges). This sex and blood-soaked saga was ripe for visual exploitation. Showtime went graphic their series The Tudors. The Other Boleyn Girl chose to go a more “tasteful” route The “PG-13” Rating insures the watching isn’t going to see anything disturbing.
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There’s really no need to rehash the story here: if you don’t know it you can probably look it up easily enough. Suffice it to say that the story is told mainly from the point of view of the Boleyn family. In this story the fact that men trade their daughters for political advancements seems to be the driving force. The Duke of Norfolk (played by David Morrissey) schemes to place his niece Anne (Natalie Portman) as King Henry’s (Eric Bana) latest mistress--but it is Mary (Scarlet Johansen) who catches his eye. This sets up a competition between the once-loving sisters which leads to the inevitable tragic conclusion.
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The Actors playing the Boleyn family all fare pretty well with the exception of Kristin Scott Thomas as the girl's long-suffering mothere (who only gets to complain about the sorry lot of the state of women.) Eric Bana doesn’t leave much of an impression as the king--but he wears the clothes well and has nice abs. (I don’t know if that’s because he really can’t act or simply because he’s not given much to do in this role.) The movie is beautifully shot and the historical costumes are lovely to look at. Personally, I had some trouble with the pace of the movie--at lot of if went way too slow for me but there were a few places where the action would skip ahead by months with nary a word--just BOOM! Still, the action is easy-enough to follow--even if the viewer doesn’t know the history. (I know at least some of the history though and I often found myself wishing for more details.) The movie tries to skew younger with the cast and story but it’s just not sexy enough to appeal to the under 40 crowd. It will do well at the Oscars in the costume and maybe makeup categories but I doubt you’ll see it anywhere else.
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I could recommend The Other Boleyn Girl for fans of historical and romance films. If you want a little more action in your history you might try looking for The Tudors.
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FINAL GRADE: B-
Today’s post begins with a fractal called MixIt. Read my commentary on The Spiderwick Chronicles and you’ll probably see why I picked that as the image.
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It wasn’t too long into The Spiderwick Chronicles that I realized I’D SEEN THIS MOVIE BEFORE. Of course then it had a different title (The Seeker) and a different cast of characters but it was essentially the same movie. The story is pretty much the same: disaffected “Tween” boy finds himself in a strange out of the way place where he encounters a magical secret that thrusts him into a "cosmic" battle he never planned on. I don’t need to say much of anything else about the story. You can almost hear the gears grinding away as the plot takes you from one point to the next. (I saw this movie in a theater full of youngsters and I don’t even think THEY were surprised.)
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Freddie Highmore (in his third movie in six months) plays Jared (the “disaffected tween” I mentioned earlier). He’s angry about having to leave his home and Father in New York City to some moldering old Victorian manse in the hinterlands. He also plays his own twin brother Simon (but manages to never give the impression that he’s playing against himself via “split screen” imaging). Character Actors David Strathairn (playing Arthur Spiderwick) and Joan Plowright (“crazy“ Aunt Lucinda) do fine with their roles Seth Rogen plays to type as the voice of Hognose the Goblin as does Martin Short providing the voice of Thimbletack--a brownie who sometimes morphs into a boggart. The effects, a mix of models and C.G.I. are acceptable if not super spectacular. The directing is suitable and the music is quite nice. In the end, it is just the overall similarity to The Seeker that really bothers me.
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The Spiderwick Chronicles isn’t a particularly bad movie--but it suffers terribly from bad timing. (If this movie and The Seeker I’d probably be making the same complaints about that one.) It lacks originality and doesn’t really make up for that with “heart” or “charm” but it is a nice, safe movie the whole family can watch.
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FINAL GRADE: C-
I picked today’s image--Grayscale 3--because of the shape and color. I see it as a convoluted mess in shades of gray while some others might see it as a nothing but black and white. Rather like the situation I’ll be discussing…
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Wednesday the New York Times featured a “Page One” story saying Republican front-runner John McCain may have had an “inappropriate” relationship with 31 year-old telecommunications lobbyist Vicki Iseman. During his run in 2004. McCain characterized the woman as “a friend“ and vigorously denied the accusation. The newspaper stands by their story. (Feel free to research the story if you need all the gory details.)
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Did he or didn’t he? Frankly--I don’t know and frankly I don’t care. The lady is pretty enough and if McCain is “gettin’ some” more power to him: that’s between him and his wife and shouldn’t concern anyone else. What I find interesting is who is saying what about the story. The Democrats aren’t commenting at present (but you gotta know they are digging in to this story looking for anything they can use). Republican commentators are ramping up the old “liberal media bias” song and dance (while ignoring the fact that the “liberal media” has given them their platform). Elizabeth Hasslebeck claimed this final “proved” the liberal bias of the New York Times (which, by the way, is the same paper that endorsed John McCain as the Republican candidate for President a few weeks earlier). Rush Limbaugh stated: “this is what happens when you reach across the aisle.” (What the hell does that even mean? How is it relevant? Can someone tell me?)
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Personally I found a little fact buried in the article to be the most interesting part of the story. It seems that while McCain was Chairman of the Senate Commerce Committee several of Ms. Iseman’s clients got important contracts--and they also contributed heavily to McCain’s campaign. (Oddly enough this part of the story isn‘t getting any coverage at all and I really wonder why.) Is it inappropriate? I don’t know but it seems a trifle “fishy” to me. Maybe it’s just doing political “business as usual” but I’d like to know more. McCain has run as the candidate of “character” but it seems he’s no better than any other politician. Maybe that is the price we have to pay for those running for office but it still makes me sad.
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Is there more to come in the story? God I hope so--otherwise the newspaper may have hung itself out to dry. All I know for certain is that we need to know more about their relationship so I hope the story doesn‘t die or get swept under the rug.-Think about it.
Today’s post begins with a fractal called Button 2. It seemed appropriate because jeans have buttons and this post continues the saga of trying to find the perfect pair of jeans for my lady Robyn. So--lets get on with the sequel NOBODY asked for!
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Some of you may wonder how it is that I ended up getting involved in Robyn’s “Jeans Quest.” Basically there are two reasons: 1) when I’m out with her I have two choices--go with her or stay in the car. 2) as a devoted hubby I feel it’s my duty to make sure Robyn doesn’t end up buying something completely awful. (Of the two of us I’m the one with the fashion sense.) Once Robyn told me she needed a second pair of jeans I knew I’d be writing a follow-up post. So here is the continuing saga…
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We first decided to check out Old Navy but quickly found out that they don’t carry “plus size” clothes. They DO have a large “on line” shop though--which we checked out. Their on-line store has almost two dozen different options in jeans at very affordable prices. Unfortunately, most of those styles are “low rise”--death for the short waistedd. They also don’t have easily-accessible Size Charts so Robyn decided not to risk buying anything. (Having been burned once she wasn’t anxious to go the catalog route again.)
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We tried visiting the J. C. Penny store at Main Place even less successful than our visit to the Westminster Mall store. The “Woman’s Wear Department” was even smaller than the other store--thus fewer selections. The jeans selection was in “broken” sizes and Robyn couldn’t find anything that remotely fit.
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A snotty Clerk at The Gap told us “we don’t sell stuff for fat chicks!” I can understand stores are going to cater to selected clientele--but these stores really need to train their clerks to be more polite. “Fat Chicks” might want to buy gifts for smaller-sized friends and family: still, if this is an indication of how they can expect to be treated at The Gap I’d suggest “fat chicks” spend their dollars elsewhere.
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The Ross Dress For Less we visited was a hot ghetto mess. Things were jammed on racks which weren’t too closely ordered by size. Robyn quickly tired pawing through racks trying to find something, anything, that would work. I’m sure there are some great deals for those willing to take the time to mine for the “gems” among the “trash” but it’s not for us.
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The Kolh’s Department Store in Huntington Beach and Huntington Beach both proved to be major disappointments. Their “Woman’s Wear” departments were small, disorganized and didn’t offer much in the way of quality or selection. The jeans Robyn found were skimpy and overpriced, The one pair she found didn’t fit well so, needless to say, she didn’t buy them.
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Wal-Mart had several jeans-styles in a number of colors. Their jeans are at least as well made as anything we found at other stores--and sold for about half the price. Wal-Mart does have one issue that really surprised us: their sizing is smaller than anywhere else we found. (Robyn tried on three pairs of Size 20W jeans and they were too small in the waist. (She refused to try on 22Ws--even for the sake of cheap jeans!)
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We had the single-best experience of either “Jeans Quest” at, of all places, Lane Bryant. Our Clerk (and I’m sorry I didn’t get her name) put the “service” in Customer Service Representative. She measured Robyn, found her a pair of jeans and then brought her a second pair when she learned Robyn didn’t like the way the first pair fit. She ended up buying the second pair (and couldn’t have bought more since the had the jeans available in multiple colors. Of course this didn’t come cheap. She ended up paying almost fifty bucks for the jeans she finally bought--about ten dollars more than anywhere else we looked. Still, I guess you get what you pay for--and she paid quite enough.
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I’m just glad this chore is done for the foreseeable future…
Today’s post begins with a fractal called Chakra Spiral. It has nothing to do with anything: I just picked it because I liked the image and I thought the blog needed a shot of color. That being said, on with the review!
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Monday Robyn and I went to see the current box-office champ Jumper. I wasn’t expecting much since I’d read several reviews and seen extensive coverage of the press tour on KTLA. (20th Century Fox paid for Sam Rubin and about 20 other journalists to visit Cairo and Rome for a week) so I wasn’t expecting a lot--and I wasn’t let down.
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15 year-old loser Dan Rice (Haden Christiansen) discovers powers of teleportation after an accident sends him into an icy river. Since his home life is total crap and he has no friends Dan decides to simply fade away and let everyone think him dead. The movie then skips ahead five years to find Dan is living the high life as a NYC Playboy (making his money by robbing banks--he even leaves I.O.U.s) where he ends running afoul of the “Paladin“ Roland--played by Samuel L. Jackson in full “badass“ mode. We later learn that “Paladins” are a well-funded and highly organized group of fanatics who have been hunting “Jumpers” for years since "only God should have the power to be everywhere at once.”) Dan barely manages to escape Roland’s attack and, for reasons I can’t fathom. decides to go back home to find his old girlfriend Sarah (Rachel Bilson). Dan whisks Sarah off to Rome for a romantic holiday. At the Roman Coliseum they encounter another Jumper (played by Jamie Bell) who for reasons never explained has been tracking Dan for ten years--even though they look to be roughly the same age. What follows is a “round the world” chase and battle the Paladins and theJumpers. A weird subplot involving Dan's mother (played by Dianne Lane) who has a secret of her own is thrown in--but that makes no more sense than the rest of the story.
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I have so many problems with this movie I don't know where to begin. Haden Christiansen is pretty enough but he has the charisma of a limp dishrag and no chmistry with his leading lady. Jamie Bell’s motives are never explained--nor is much of anything else. Worse yet, Jumper doesn’t even stick to its own plot conceits--making any half-way aware watcher go “huh? How’d that happen?” There are more hole in the plot than you’d find in the average 100 pound wheel of Swiss Cheese and the story changes facts from begining to end--making for a confusing mess. Instead the movie relies on fast pace, cool teleportation effects and shots of famous places. (The movie had locations as diverse as Rome, the Pyramids of Giza, Paris, Tokyo, and New York City. (Maybe they had such a big travel budget they couldn’t afford decent actors or writers.)
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Is Jumper the worst movie I’ve ever seen? Not by a long shot--but it comes close. It is the worst movie I’ve seen since I’ve been reviewing movies on this blog. There is nothing worthwhile here for anyone who is half way rational--yet somehow this was the Number One movie at the Box Office this week--and may repeat that feat next week so what does it say about my credentials as a critic? Do yourself and everyone else a favor and avoid this colossal turkey.
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FINAL GRADE: F
No fractal for this post--just a brief update to keep my "loyal readers" up on news I've covered...-It seems the firing on Duane "Dog the Bounty Hunter" Chap man didn't take over at the A&E Network (and really--who didn't see that coming?) I guess we're a lot more tolerant of racist remarks than I thought. ANYway--part of me is a bit curious to see how/if they cover the "incident" on his show.
Today’s post begins with a fractal called In Memory. I created it the day of the bus bombings in London to honor the victims there but I guess the image will serve to memorialize all victims of needless violence.
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There have been several shootings in the news this past week that have really occupied my mind. Don’t worry--this won’t be a polemic on gun control: nothing I can say will change anyone’s minds--be they for or against. I just felt the need to put “pen to paper” (as it were) to express my feelings…
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Today Los Angeles Police Officer Randal Simmons will be laid to rest. He is the first S.W.A.T. Officer to be killed in the line of duty. He died shielding his fellow officers from bullets fired by a deranged young man who had already killed his father and two brothers. (Edwin Rivera was reportedly distraught over the death of his mother several years earlier.)
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On Tuesday February 12 15 year-old Middle School Student Lawrence King was shot in the head by a 14 year-old classmate--reportedly because King was gay. The shooter (identified as Brandon McInerny on KCBS TV--Channel 2) will be tried as an adult for murder and the commission of a hate crime.
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Yesterday, Steven Kazmierczak, 27, turned a gun on himself after killing six students in a Northern Illinois University Lecture Hall. At present there is no indication he knew anyone in the class and there is no known motive for the rampage. (He was a good student and had no “red flags” to raise alarms--although he had recently stopped taking medication for some personality disorder.
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I think about incidents like this and all I can do is shake my head and ask myself “why?” Why would anyone feel the need to do such a thing? Why didn’t anyone close to them see it coming and why didn’t they seek help? Were there signs of trouble that the those close to the shooters missed?
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At least in Brandon McInerney’s I can almost wrap my head around it. I was a “different” kid who was picked on in school because I was artistic and somewhat too emotional and I know how calculatingly cruel children can be. But I still have to ask myself--what the hell was this kid thinking??? (Obviously, as a 15 year-old he WASN’T thinking--but still!) I understand he was living with his grandfather (so there had to be some family issues) but I still can’t figure out where he got the idea that getting a gun and shooting someone FOR ANY REASON would be a good idea. Was he goaded into it by his buddies or did he come up with the idea all on his own. The kid’s grandfather reportedly doesn’t own a gun so where does a 14 year-old manage to get one? How could such a thing happen?
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Above all I wonder if he even understands what he did. I suspect the answer would be no. I imagine he must be upset and afraid (and I’m sure his family must be devastated). Still, none of this is an excuse to let the kid off for what he did: I hope he’s punished to the full extent of the law. Maybe, just maybe that will dissuade other kids from doing the same thing (although I really doubt that.)
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What can we do? I don’t know. Watch the people close to us, make sure they stay on meds and report any signs of trouble. Praying would probably help too.
Picking a fractal for today‘s review of The Other Boleyn Girl was harder than it seemed. I’ve already used most of my of “royal” images (A Regal Image, Corona) so I needed to move somewhere else. Thus I chose Crown of Stars 26. I thought the colors were suitably rich and the shapes wonderfully baroque. The “crown” conjures images of royalty and there were several real “stars” in the movie. So--on with the review!
